Happy -- warm, mellow, just-got-done-playing-jazz-on-my-guit happy. Very few things in life touch this little glow.

Relieved that my wife and her sister are about to conclude their legal dispute over the handling and distribution of their mother's estate. Now all that's left is for the signed agreement to be filed with the court and for the house to be sold. Then it's over. The whole thing has been quite an emotional rollercoaster for my wife. Perhaps she'll be able to close that chapter soon and catch some peace.

Also, a little anxious: my youngest daughter leaves for Kazan, Russia tomorrow morning to work as a governess for the next 6 months (possibly longer). I'm confident she'll be ok and will enjoy the experience. But -- you know -- daddy's little girl. She and a band she has been working with just finished recording a seven-song EP that will come out sometime late February after mixing is finished (she completed her vocals two days ago). She won't be there for the mixing but has expressed confidence that everything will be done well in her absence. I can't wait to hear it.

Struggling through a shitty day at work, trying to stay in a good space ... triggers all over the place.

Like I'm not-so-slowly going barking mad.

 .........

(January 27, 2017 at 7:25 pm)dg4245 Wrote:  .........

Depressed, need moral support atm. Out of resources. Sarcastic threats. No willpower, Being a good muslim atm, just to keep family safe.

Very tired. Lack of sleep and hard training. After this week i'm giving my body a long break. It needs it.

Going through phases.

Of horniness and silliness.

I haven't really been sleeping much. Had to sedate myself hard the couple of nights and still did not sleep well. The five nights prior I got maybe fifteen hours total. It starts to mess with your brain after awhile.

Sleep better soon, CD.

I know how lack of sleep can affect me. It can make me cry easily and it can also make me manic as fuck.

I hope you're able to rest better soon