(November 16, 2018 at 9:42 am)Jörmungandr Wrote:

(November 16, 2018 at 6:31 am)Joods Wrote: I have come to the conclusion that I have the attention span of a three year old.

What?

I see what you did... Squirrel? Where?

I wonder if, while getting milked by hand, a cow looks at the farmer and thinks "fucking perv!"?

Her: I know it's horribly unethical by I really want a miniaturized zonkey that wears sneakers for a house pet.

Me: How flexible are your morals?

Her: Why

Me: So I can figure out how robust my breeding program needs to be.

...

Me: If you cross a crocodile with a zonkey do you get a cronkey?

Her: No, you get a cranky!

Me: No, you get a Crikey!

Her: Where does the "I" come from.

Me: Steve Irwin's legacy was putting the "I" in "Crikey!"

Life stinks. Thank God for football.

Just as a parenthetical, it's a shame we can't use the jerkoff emoji in the Civil Discussion section of the forum. It would save a lot of unnecessary typing.

You know how, when you’re doing creme brûlée, you use a butane torch to carmelize the top? Bit of advice: when you shut the torch off and set it down, try your very best to NOT pick it up again by the nozzle.

This is going to hurt for a week is what I’m thinking.

Boru

(November 17, 2018 at 10:03 pm)Jörmungandr Wrote: Life stinks.  Thank God for football.

Just as a parenthetical, it's a shame we can't use the jerkoff emoji in the Civil Discussion section of the forum.  It would save a lot of unnecessary typing.

Civil Discussion

Code words for "Don't diss my religion. FFS. This is the last time I post something about that whole snowflake-fest. [sets to COMPLETE eyeroll ignore]. Not pegging you, BTW, Jorg.

I always see studies on how sleeping with a blue nightlight can be bad for sleep, that it can disrupt melatonin production. Maybe I'm an outlier or something, because I've always slept best with a dim blue nightlight. Other colors not so much. Can hardly sleep when it's pitch black, either, since I'm uh...scared of the dark :S

Blue is just such a calm color, for me anyway. Sometimes I'll put a lil cover over the nightlight to make it project a starry sky.

If a Muslim beats his wife is that domestic violence or child abuse?

(November 18, 2018 at 12:33 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: If a Muslim beats his wife is that domestic violence or child abuse?

(November 17, 2018 at 10:03 pm)Jörmungandr Wrote: Life stinks. Thank God for football.

Just as a parenthetical, it's a shame we can't use the jerkoff emoji in the Civil Discussion section of the forum. It would save a lot of unnecessary typing.

You could say you thought it Was someone about to throw Some dice?