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Cecelia · December 4, 2018 at 12:03 am

The song is certainly troubling in the culture we have today. With Donald as President, Kavanaugh as a Supreme Court Justice, people thinking they can decide when someone has been violated or not better than the victim's themselves. The song wouldn't be an issue if we didn't have such a big culture problem where rape is dismissed if the woman didn't fight back hard enough or because it's politically inconvenient. While I don't think removing the song will do anything to combat the culture that persists here, I do think it's important to recognize the underlying problems. We're sending more messages to boys that "No doesn't always mean no!"

**The Grand Nudger** · December 4, 2018 at 12:28 am

So long as we exist in a society where it commonly doesn't....it will always be a confusing message to young girls and boys alike. Obviously, just sticking with no means no will solve the immediate problem of sexual assault..but we really have to work our prudish shit out, too...at some point. We're taught that the sexual dynamic is that girls put up token resistence and guys signify their interest and worth through persistence.

Pretty much a recipe for misery. We probably ought to tell our daughters to be peener go-getters, if that's what they want to be, just like we tell our sons with respect to the vj. That'll put the two on the same page right quick.

Shell B · December 4, 2018 at 12:44 am

(December 3, 2018 at 11:14 pm)Amarok Wrote:
Quote:There is no definition that says drunk=rape unless you’re a fucking psychopath.
There is at least there is enough of one for some people to be outraged about it .

Quote:Why the fuck do you keep calling people I’ve had sex with rapists every time we talk about rape? You’re ridiculous.
I have not called people you have had sex with rapists . I said once again if we define drunk = rape as in having sex with a drunk person is rape . Then they would be . However i have not said if it was true or not. Name calling does not change they above .

(December 3, 2018 at 10:49 pm)Shell B Wrote: I never said I preconsented every time I’ve had drunk sex. You’re basically telling me I’ve been raped in spite of the reality. Again, this is why I’d ont have this conversation with you, Tiz.
I never said you said that i was responding to Ladies scenario and pointing out that it included consent before getting drunk thus it not analogous to the idea that having sex with a drunk person is rape . I'm starting to get the impression we can't have this conversation because it always ends with you accusing me of saying you were raped . That makes it kind of hard .

Oh, please. Do you think a woman who has sex while drunk was raped or not?

Amarok · December 4, 2018 at 12:56 am

(December 4, 2018 at 12:44 am)Shell B Wrote:
(December 3, 2018 at 11:14 pm)Amarok Wrote: There is at least there is enough of one for some people to be outraged about it .

I have not called people you have had sex with rapists . I said once again if we define drunk = rape as in having sex with a drunk person is rape . Then they would be . However i have not said if it was true or not. Name calling does not change they above .

I never said you said that i was responding to Ladies scenario and pointing out that it included consent before getting drunk thus it not analogous to the idea that having sex with a drunk person is rape . I'm starting to get the impression we can't have this conversation because it always ends with you accusing me of saying you were raped . That makes it kind of hard .

Oh, please. Do you think a woman who has sex while drunk was raped or not?

As i said i can't say if it's true or not

Shell B · December 4, 2018 at 1:04 am

Why? Do you think being drunk inherently makes you unable to consent?

**Rev. Rye** · (This post was last modified: December 4, 2018 at 1:14 am by Rev. Rye.)

(December 4, 2018 at 12:44 am)Shell B Wrote: Oh, please. Do you think a woman who has sex while drunk was raped or not?

Yeah, Tizh, I like you and all, but I have to admit, for someone who's professing to not have an opinion one way or the other on the issue, you seem to be acting like you do. There's a time and a place for the typical fierceness you've exhibited in debates on this thread and elsewhere, but arguing this vociferously with a woman about whether or not drunk people having sex constitutes rape (borderline mansplaining that most/all of the men she's been with have raped her at some point) without even having the courtesy of picking a side is not it. If you don't have a position, that's where you lay your cards on the table and let the other party know, like I've done on this thread. This... well, it sounds like you're trolling.

What the actual Hell, Tizh?

Mr.Obvious · December 4, 2018 at 7:36 am

(December 2, 2018 at 8:14 pm)SteelCurtain Wrote: The term 'banned' is just a click bait, though.

It was removed from the playlist of one radio station in Cleveland.

Again, I think we'll all be fine. The 3 of the 7 people who still listen to terrestrial radio in Cleveland complained and they just won't be playing it.

Spotify still has you covered.

Good point. Not exactly 'banned'.
And you can't possibly play every song, nor should you. They are definitely allowed and welcome to air what they wish to air, on their station.

But then still the reason why it got removed, is 'bothersome'. If it's removed because the owner or the DJ doesn't like the song, or because it doesn't draw enough listeners. Fine. But it still got removed because of social pressure, or am I mistaken about that too? (Haven't read the article, to be perfectly honest with you.)
Then again, maybe it's just a publicity stunt.

**BrianSoddingBoru4** · (This post was last modified: December 4, 2018 at 8:13 am by BrianSoddingBoru4.)

Hypothetical:

I’m on the sofa watching telly. My wife enters the room wearing a hair ribbon and half a bottle of whiskey. She is clearly drunk - not high, not mellow-ly inebriated, not tipsy. She is hammered. She is so drunk the Brendan Behan would tell her she’s overdoing it. She is at a level of drunkenness against which the angels themselves would contend in vain. She is so drunk that Bushmills stock just rose 2%.

She walks over to me and manages to slur out, ‘I want you to bang me like a snare drum.’ Obliging fellow that I am, I happily comply.

Did I rape my wife?

Boru

I_am_not_mafia · (This post was last modified: December 4, 2018 at 9:15 am by I_am_not_mafia.)

(December 3, 2018 at 8:19 pm)Shell B Wrote:
(December 3, 2018 at 8:18 pm)Amarok Wrote: No it doesn't their is nothing weak about it nor is it weak when it happens to men

Telling me I can’t consent if I’ve had a couple of drinks takes away my autonomy.

You get drunk with a couple of drinks?

ShellB, why are you making it a question of whether consenting to sex is rape if you are slightly intoxicated? That's a false dichotomy.

Is sexual assault rape?

No.

Does that mean that sexual assault is therefore OK?

No. Rape is an extreme form of sexual assault.

In the same way that rape is a more extreme form of sexual coercion yet not all sexual coercion is rape.

Amarok · (This post was last modified: December 4, 2018 at 9:36 am by Amarok.)

(December 4, 2018 at 1:04 am)Shell B Wrote: Why? Do you think being drunk inherently makes you unable to consent?

I didn't say that i said don't know if it's true or not

(December 4, 2018 at 8:00 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Hypothetical:

I’m on the sofa watching telly. My wife enters the room wearing a hair ribbon and half a bottle of whiskey. She is clearly drunk - not high, not mellow-ly inebriated, not tipsy. She is hammered. She is so drunk the Brendan Behan would tell her she’s overdoing it. She is at a level of drunkenness against which the angels themselves would contend in vain. She is so drunk that Bushmills stock just rose 2%.

She walks over to me and manages to slur out, ‘I want you to bang me like a snare drum.’ Obliging fellow that I am, I happily comply.

Did I rape my wife?

Boru

Some would argue you have some would argue you haven't

(December 4, 2018 at 7:36 am)Mr.Obvious Wrote:
(December 2, 2018 at 8:14 pm)SteelCurtain Wrote: The term 'banned' is just a click bait, though.

It was removed from the playlist of one radio station in Cleveland.

Again, I think we'll all be fine. The 3 of the 7 people who still listen to terrestrial radio in Cleveland complained and they just won't be playing it.

Spotify still has you covered.

Good point. Not exactly 'banned'.
And you can't possibly play every song, nor should you. They are definitely allowed and welcome to air what they wish to air, on their station.

But then still the reason why it got removed, is 'bothersome'. If it's removed because the owner or the DJ doesn't like the song, or because it doesn't draw enough listeners. Fine. But it still got removed because of social pressure, or am I mistaken about that too? (Haven't read the article, to be perfectly honest with you.)
Then again, maybe it's just a publicity stunt.

It was the station choice to give into that pressure there is little the objectors could have actually done

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