(January 16, 2014 at 1:51 am)Sinnersburninhell100 Wrote: I hop you reconsider the path atheism leads to. Hell is not a good place to go.

Quote:Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic?

As you study for exams, remember its not the quantity it's the quantity. And remember there is no substitute for pure unadulterated bull

Dr. Schambaugh, of the University of Oklahoma School of Chemical Engineering, Final Exam question for May of 1997. Dr. Schambaugh is known for asking questions such as, "why do airplanes fly?" on his final exams. His one and only final exam question in May 1997 for his Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer II class was: "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof."

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

"First, We postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave.

Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, then you will go to hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. Two options exist:

If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.
If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the quote given to me by Theresa Manyan during Freshman year, "that it will be a cold night in hell before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I still have NOT succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then Option 2 cannot be true...Thus, hell is exothermic."

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct…leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a Divine Being, which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting, “Oh, My God.”


The student, Tim Graham, got the only A.

(January 16, 2014 at 1:51 am)Sinnersburninhell100 Wrote: I hop you reconsider the path atheism leads to. Hell is not a good place to go.

(January 16, 2014 at 2:13 am)Minimalist Wrote:

Quote: Got lots of things like "be open minded!"

Have you ever wondered why that is a one-way street with these assholes?

(January 16, 2014 at 11:46 am)Crossless1 Wrote: It sounds like you handled yourself well. I'm curious to know what, if anything, your parents had to say after your meeting. Is this the beginning of an ordeal, or will they back off a bit?

(January 16, 2014 at 11:49 am)Wunsbee Wrote: My mother is acting strange, It's like she expected me to come out a full believer again or something.

(January 16, 2014 at 11:49 am)Wunsbee Wrote:

(January 16, 2014 at 11:46 am)Crossless1 Wrote: It sounds like you handled yourself well. I'm curious to know what, if anything, your parents had to say after your meeting. Is this the beginning of an ordeal, or will they back off a bit?

My mother is acting strange, It's like she expected me to come out a full believer again or something.

(January 16, 2014 at 11:51 am)Bad Wolf Wrote:

(January 16, 2014 at 11:49 am)Wunsbee Wrote: My mother is acting strange, It's like she expected me to come out a full believer again or something.

Has she ever met an atheist before? Or do you reckon she thinks you are possessed or something?

(January 16, 2014 at 1:40 pm)Chad32 Wrote: "Be open minded"? I'm way ahead of you. Open mindedness is why I'm an atheist, after all.

I'm glad your ordeal went well. I was fortunate enough to have moved out before I announced I was an athest. My parents aren't big into the religion anyway. Mostly just my grandmother. I'm glad your parents aren't so extreme that they'd harm you because of your atheist.