(January 2, 2015 at 3:18 pm)Losty Wrote: If your wife doesn't trust you it's something you need to work on.

My wife trusts me, in part because I recognize human frailty and wouldn't suggest going to a place known as Sin City in the first place.

Quote:Either you've given her a reason not to trust you, or she has an unhealthy level of jealousy. Whether your friends are married, single, divorced, or widowed has no bearing on how trustworthy you are. If you as an adult feel you cannot handle any amount of peer pressure (that you hopefully wouldn't receive because you're friends aren't teenagers or jackasses, right?)

Actually, yes, groups of guys heading to Las Vegas frequently do intend to act like teenagers and jackasses.

Quote:to cheat on your wife, then you as a trustworthy husband would choose on your own not to take such a trip.

Exactly my point.

Quote:The idea that a man cannot handle a week away from his wife without fucking every female in sight is ridiculous.

The idea that environment has no effect on behavior is ridiculous.

Quote:However, I would like to say that I am pleased you would even consider your wife's opinion. Based on previous sexist posts by you I assumed if your wife objected to something you wanted you would proceed to put her in her place.

You see what you want to see.

Says the man who sees an invisible sky fairy. I don't believe in sin and the whole temptation bit is bullshit. If you want to do something you will, if you don't you won't. Regardless of whether or not you're in sin city. *Losty rolls her eyes*

This thread has been pretty good even with the absence of the OP.
Wonder if he is still among the living?

(January 2, 2015 at 4:08 pm)Losty Wrote: Says the man who sees an invisible sky fairy. I don't believe in sin and the whole temptation bit is bullshit. If you want to do something you will, if you don't you won't. Regardless of whether or not you're in sin city. *Losty rolls her eyes*

You can term it other than sin if you like, but I doubt you really believe the rest of it. I doubt you would counsel a recovering alcoholic to go ahead and hang out in bars, but just drink Coke, because the whole temptation bit is bullshit. You'd probably do the right thing and tell them that it's likely better to stay away from bars.

(January 2, 2015 at 4:10 pm)professor Wrote: This thread has been pretty good even with the absence of the OP.
Wonder if he is still among the living?

Hey prof, how have you been? I feel like I haven't been seeing you around much. Hanging out in all the wrong places I suppose.

(January 2, 2015 at 4:10 pm)professor Wrote: This thread has been pretty good even with the absence of the OP.
Wonder if he is still among the living?

Maybe his computer time is spent with porn, as he's probably not getting any from the wife.

(January 2, 2015 at 4:10 pm)professor Wrote: This thread has been pretty good even with the absence of the OP.
Wonder if he is still among the living?

So she might have succeeded at sucking the life out of him?

(January 2, 2015 at 4:13 pm)alpha male Wrote:

(January 2, 2015 at 4:08 pm)Losty Wrote: Says the man who sees an invisible sky fairy. I don't believe in sin and the whole temptation bit is bullshit. If you want to do something you will, if you don't you won't. Regardless of whether or not you're in sin city. *Losty rolls her eyes*

You can term it other than sin if you like, but I doubt you really believe the rest of it. I doubt you would counsel a recovering alcoholic to go ahead and hang out in bars, but just drink Coke, because the whole temptation bit is bullshit. You'd probably do the right thing and tell them that it's likely better to stay away from bars.

This is where the fucking bullshit is. Jesus fucking Christ on a Popsicle stick do you not see how you just compared a man wanting not to cheat on his wife to an alcoholic not wanting to drink!?

Alcoholism is a disease where people are addicted to drinking.

The idea that men are these sex crazed beasts barely able to contain the animal inside them is bullshit. If you walked into a room and I was kneeling in the bed in nothing but heels and nylons you would have the choice to cheat on your wife or walk away. You are not an animal or a sex addict. Being a man doesn't mean you would be so overcome by desire that you'd forget you had a wife.

(January 2, 2015 at 11:23 am)Losty Wrote: I just wanted to add in here. I am shocked at the number of people who were against the vacation. I see nothing wrong with a person who is in a stable committed marriage going off for a week with some friends. No matter how much you love someone I can only imagine after several years you need a break to remember that you are not simply so and so's spouse but you are also your own person. Take a break to be just you for a week with old friends you haven't seen since college. In a trusting marriage, you should be able to do that and come home rejuvenated to a spouse who has also had a nice break and is happy to have you home. I feel like so many marriages fail because people think you're supposed to get married and then forevermore be Mr. And Mrs. Couple that never does anything separate. Also, if you can't trust your spouse for a week without you, you probably shouldn't be married to them in the first place.

(bold mine)

I agree with you, Losty, but I think the whole point of this thread is that the OP and his wife aren't in a stable marriage, and he needs to make his marriage a priority before going off for a week with his buddies.

(January 2, 2015 at 3:32 pm)Tonus Wrote:

(January 2, 2015 at 1:36 pm)whateverist Wrote: Word! One of my favorite aspects of my own marriage is that my wife takes several or more trips a year to give talks, attend openings or go to conferences. I love getting a week to move at my own pace and to notice by its absence what it is I like about having her around.

Beyond that we don't crowd each other even when we're around. We still play cards over every meal we eat together when no one else is here. But I have the freedom to sink hours into the garden or reading and she does the same in her studio. I've got to get regular solitude to feel centered at all.

One thing we both have is a lot of is trust, we both get it. So that just isn't a concern. It is only a matter of comfort. I joke with Lia that if she goes for more than 10 days she should be considerate and arrange for her own temporary replacement to spare me the inconvenience.

Ummm... how is any of that possible if you're an atheist?

I'm probably just being dense here but why would being an atheist matter here?