Victim Blaming?

[LadyForCamus]

Plenty of young women get too drunk. Plenty of young men get too drunk. But it seems like only the rapists rape people...

[Losty]

Meh forgive me for being unconvinced but I've been black out drunk hundreds of times, when I was raped I was in a church, wearing modest clothing, trying to be godly. Maybe it was like retroactive karma for the days of drinking to come

[Excited Penguin]

Plenty of young women get too drunk.  Plenty of young men get too drunk.  But it seems like only the rapists rape people...

I guess I can understand that.

Me drunk or drugged is only an extension of my sober self as far as I can tell. Rape has never even crossed my mind(as something to do for real), so I don't think it ever would solely based on what kind of substance I'd be abusing at any one time.

[LadyForCamus]

You know, I've never had to think about it myself.  I don't worry that I'll wake up in the rape ward if I get tipsy.  Jail cell, maybe.  A ditch, with blood in my hair...sure.  A redneck militant bunker surrounded by trweaking hillbillies, fine, you got me.....but not raped.  No one has ever said to me "if you drink to much you put yourself at risk of rape."  "If you dress such and such a way you may be taken advantage of."   Not the slightest implication of a shared burden.  

Yet another thing that's not a thing in my life.

What the hell is a "rape ward"?  Where do you LIVE?  Lol.

[LadyForCamus]

Plenty of young women get too drunk.  Plenty of young men get too drunk.  But it seems like only the rapists rape people...

I guess I can understand that.

Me drunk or drugged is only an extension of my sober self as far as I can tell. Rape has never even crossed my mind(as something to do for real), so I don't think it ever would solely based on what kind of substance I'd be abusing at any one time.

Exactly.  Alcohol lowers inhibitions and impulse control, so if someone is ALREADY inclined to such acts then of course we're going to see a correlation between alcohol consumption among the men committing them.  What about every other man in the world who drinks heavily but has never had any remote desire to rape?  

Trying to be a more responsible adult going forward is a healthy goal to have, but blaming alcohol for behavior is stupid.   IMO, ofc.  

[Arkilogue]

I understand both sides of the argument.

Females shouldn't have to worry about doing something, like drinking, or dressing in a certain way, or partying with strangers, lest they get raped. They shouldn't and it's unfair. And it can be hard for some males to relate to this, case in point with Ark there.

But it is a reality. Rape happens a lot. We have to deal with it to the best of our abilities.

Life is neither fair nor nice. Most living things have to fight tooth and nail or fly away to remain living in the natural environment.

I'm saying trying to blame either party gets in the way of actually being able to prepare for and deal with the situation if it happens. It's completely beside the point of rational self protection....which starts with being able to remain conscious and in good control of all your facilities.

[Arkilogue]

Consistency of metaphor is important:

Bold mine

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You mean of analogy?

Thanks for the correction.

[Excited Penguin]

I understand both sides of the argument.

Females shouldn't have to worry about doing something, like drinking, or dressing in a certain way, or partying with strangers, lest they get raped. They shouldn't and it's unfair. And it can be hard for some males to relate to this, case in point with Ark there.

But it is a reality. Rape happens a lot. We have to deal with it to the best of our abilities.

Life is neither fair nor nice. Most living things have to fight tooth and nail or fly away to remain living in the natural environment.

I'm saying trying to blame either party gets in the way of actually being able to prepare for and deal with the situation if it happens. It's completely beside the point of rational self protection....which starts with being able to remain conscious and in good control of all your facilities.

I completely agree, but that's only because I don't believe in free will, so there's no point in assigning blame to anyone for anything, ever, in my mind. This is not just about rape. Your approach is objective and concerned with dealing with the problem rather than lingering on who's at fault for doing what. I understand that, other people don't though. Either try to get better across to those who don't, or suffer the consequences of being misunderstood. I did for a long time. I advice against doing nothing about it.

Sometimes expressing a point you know will not go well is not the best idea. It's not about being right all the time. It's also about knowing your conversational partners.

[BrokenQuill92]

Sorry fell asleep. All I'm trying to say is, as a woman we are already for the most part smaller and weaker. Why do something to put your life in danger. No it's not your fault, but in this world it's simply safer to treat all men as at least semi-dangerous until proven otherwise.

[BrokenQuill92]

Personally I treat everyone as semi-dangerous until proven otherwise