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RE: Quitting church
December 11, 2016 at 8:24 pm
Ooh off topic but I've been to The Netherlands several times. Lovely country, my Dad wanted to live there
"Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the road, and then getting hit by an airplane" - sarcasm_only
"Ironically like the nativist far-Right, which despises multiculturalism, but benefits from its ideas of difference to scapegoat the other and to promote its own white identity politics; these postmodernists, leftists, feminists and liberals also use multiculturalism, to side with the oppressor, by demanding respect and tolerance for oppression characterised as 'difference', no matter how intolerable." - Maryam Namazie
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RE: Quitting church
December 11, 2016 at 9:21 pm
Welcome to the forum! I quit the Catholic church when I was 13-14. My parents were just a bit upset. Then they switched over to pentecostalism and I did not go with them. They were upset about that until I was 38 years old. Now I am 57 and all that is water under the bridge.
God thinks it's fun to confuse primates. Larsen's God!
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RE: Quitting church
December 11, 2016 at 9:56 pm
Yes welcome and good luck. As oppressive as the religion has come to be try to bear in mind that they don't mean for it to be. They've been trying to share what they feel is really, really important. It is fine for you to disagree with them about that. Just don't blame them for the poor fit of their beliefs. They meant well.
Long term you'll probably want some closeness and you really only get one crack at having a family of origin. You sound pretty confident in yourself and that will help. Maybe you can just break it to them gently, recognizing how hard it will be for them to hear? You obviously need to start the process. Don't expect it to be done with super quickly.
Anyhow, you're not alone and being true to yourself is always a good idea. We're here for commiserating as needed. If you're at a university you should have access to a wide social network that isn't part of the religion you were born into.
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RE: Quitting church
December 15, 2016 at 4:05 pm
Welcome to freedom.
"For the only way to eternal glory is a life lived in service of our Lord, FSM; Verily it is FSM who is the perfect being the name higher than all names, king of all kings and will bestow upon us all, one day, The great reclaiming" -The Prophet Boiardi-
Conservative trigger warning.
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RE: Quitting church
December 15, 2016 at 4:27 pm
(December 11, 2016 at 3:06 pm)ericavdmaas Wrote: Hi everyone,
I'm new to this forum, and I usually don't do this sort of thing, but I really just needed to write some things down and clear my mind. I'm warning you, this is probably going to be a long and boring post
...
But I've made up my mind and gathered my courage. All I need to do is take a (very) deep breath and make a leap - sometimes a big leap is the only option. Just hoping for the best.
Erica
Erica--
I do have a thought on this. I am assuming you have encountered information that you think proves your parents beliefs are wrong. Perhaps your parents are like mine and many other and do not have sophisticated answers to the sophisticated question/criticisms you may have encountered. That does not mean answers to those questions/criticisms do not exists. While your parents (and perhaps your priest/minister) may not be able to help, consider that you may owe it to your parents to at least seek out someone (or a book) that can defend their faith better than they can. I think this approach would be honoring them as well as genuinely seeking truth.
Be careful not to get immersed in an echo chamber of bad information, poor argumentation, and angry people with agendas.
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RE: Quitting church
December 15, 2016 at 4:41 pm
(December 15, 2016 at 4:27 pm)SteveII Wrote: (December 11, 2016 at 3:06 pm)ericavdmaas Wrote: Hi everyone,
I'm new to this forum, and I usually don't do this sort of thing, but I really just needed to write some things down and clear my mind. I'm warning you, this is probably going to be a long and boring post
...
But I've made up my mind and gathered my courage. All I need to do is take a (very) deep breath and make a leap - sometimes a big leap is the only option. Just hoping for the best.
Erica
Erica--
I do have a thought on this. I am assuming you have encountered information that you think proves your parents beliefs are wrong. Perhaps your parents are like mine and many other and do not have sophisticated answers to the sophisticated question/criticisms you may have encountered. That does not mean answers to those questions/criticisms do not exists. While your parents (and perhaps your priest/minister) may not be able to help, consider that you may owe it to your parents to at least seek out someone (or a book) that can defend their faith better than they can. I think this approach would be honoring them as well as genuinely seeking truth.
Be careful not to get immersed in an echo chamber of bad information, poor argumentation, and angry people with agendas. bold mine
Nice guilt trip. But is one of the tools often used isn't it.
Why should she "owe" a belief or faith to anyone? Why should she have to "honor" anyone with a belief?
And who is this someone who can defend the faith better than her parents or priest, you?
Go fishing on some other site. This one got away. And you're a dick!
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental.
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RE: Quitting church
December 15, 2016 at 4:48 pm
(This post was last modified: December 15, 2016 at 4:54 pm by Crossless2.0.)
(December 15, 2016 at 4:27 pm)SteveII Wrote: Be careful not to get immersed in an echo chamber of bad information, poor argumentation, and angry people with agendas.
Irony really isn't your thing, is it?
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RE: Quitting church
December 15, 2016 at 5:15 pm
I'm sure the asshole cannot see himself!
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RE: Quitting church
December 15, 2016 at 5:16 pm
(December 15, 2016 at 4:41 pm)mh.brewer Wrote: (December 15, 2016 at 4:27 pm)SteveII Wrote: Erica--
I do have a thought on this. I am assuming you have encountered information that you think proves your parents beliefs are wrong. Perhaps your parents are like mine and many other and do not have sophisticated answers to the sophisticated question/criticisms you may have encountered. That does not mean answers to those questions/criticisms do not exists. While your parents (and perhaps your priest/minister) may not be able to help, consider that you may owe it to your parents to at least seek out someone (or a book) that can defend their faith better than they can. I think this approach would be honoring them as well as genuinely seeking truth.
Be careful not to get immersed in an echo chamber of bad information, poor argumentation, and angry people with agendas. bold mine
Nice guilt trip. But is one of the tools often used isn't it.
Why should she "owe" a belief or faith to anyone? Why should she have to "honor" anyone with a belief?
And who is this someone who can defend the faith better than her parents or priest, you?
Go fishing on some other site. This one got away. And you're a dick!
I didn't say anything about owing a belief or faith to anyone--that is an individual's choice. I think a teenager should honor their parents by giving their beliefs a fair hearing. I am guessing at the circumstances, but if they are like many parents, they are not prepared for the sophisticated attack on their beliefs that their children become exposed to in school and on the internet.
If Erica want's to ask me who or what book, than she may. My advice to get all the information available was not to you.
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RE: Quitting church
December 15, 2016 at 5:19 pm
She's way ahead of you.
Your god is a phony.
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