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Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
#1
Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
I don't care who you are, I don't care what you've done, I don't care who is right, I don't care who is wrong in this regard: I apologize to anyone on AF who I have ever insulted. There is no hate here, no malice, no anger, no resentment, no hatred. Sometimes I just get aggressive when I'm speaking my mind. My primary motive is always to speak my mind and say what I think.

But when it comes to speaking my mind, insults are not helpful. And even swearing that insults what someone said rather than insulting the person: None of that is helpful unless the intention is to be humorous (and you're very clearly laughing with someone and not at them). I'd never wish to stop swearing, swearing is awesome, swearing is fun. But to say that something someone said is fucking stupid, while not being as bad as saying they are fucking stupid, whether sincere or not it's not helpful or persuasive.

So, I feel no hate, no malice, no anger, no resentment. But I also feel no regret, shame, or remorse. I feel no emotion about the past about these things but I do reflect and intend to do better in future. What I do hope for is the following: I hope making a post like this and expressing a genuine intention to become a less insulting and aggressive person, whether I'm speaking my mind or not, will be a helpful post to others and I hope I will be able to change for the better.

Finally, I am not sure if the following statement is helpful or not, but it's harmless at worst, and it is also sincere: I have often spoken my mind and been insulting and aggressive-sounding while swearing without feeling any anger, despite seeming angry. I often come across as ways I am not, and give false impressions, but my intention is never to mislead, my intention is only to speak my mind. The point always was that I didn't really care about how I came across what I cared about was what I really believed and that I knew I was genuinely speaking my mind.

But the important part is I intend to be less unhelpful and less uncivil. And I realize that insults and aggression is not an effective way to convince anyone of the truth. I also realize that if I feel like someone is a bad influence on AF, and I am trying to let people know that they are, I am not going to convince anyone of the truth of the things I say when I speak my mind by saying them with more aggressive or insulting fervor.

Honesty is fine. Brutal honestly is also fine but it's unnecessary if one can express honesty without brutality.

P.S. Apologies for the redundancy and repetition in this post. I think my first priority with regards to my communication skills is to reduce all insults and aggression. I think my second priority is to avoid my compulsive responding. And I think the reducing my redundancy and repetition is only my third and final priority (with regards to communication skills, I mean).

Thank you.
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#2
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
I think this was very big of you. <3
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly." 

-walsh
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#3
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
(November 5, 2017 at 5:30 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: I think this was very big of you. <3

Well to me it's less about humility and maturity and more about me only expressing these things when I genuinely believe them. Sure, I am often stubborn and don't admit I'm wrong. But I'm not going to admit I'm wrong about something until I think I am!

Thanks though! Smile
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#4
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
Does that mean you take it back?   Sad




















[J/K fogedaboutit]
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#5
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
(November 5, 2017 at 6:38 pm)Whateverist Wrote: Does that mean you take it back?   Sad




















[J/K fogedaboutit]

Well that depends what you mean. I honestly meant the insults when I said them which may or may not be hurtful to the people I said them to. But the reality is I was just speaking my mind in the moment and how I am one moment does not necessarily represent how I am at other moments. I'm a rather inconsistent character although I always just speak my mind.

The point is I am starting to strongly believe that speaking my mind when I'm saying things that are not only unhelpful but they are not going to convince anyone, is pointless. I can simply speak my mind but omit the nasty shit. It doesn't help. And I don't necessarily have to have a higher purpose than simply speaking my mind honestly but I do think that omitting honest statements that harm would be wise for myself and all. And if I struggle to ignore perhaps I should resort to saying something innocuous because if truly innocuous that would be innocuous.
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#6
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
You could always send out some PM messages.
<insert profound quote here>
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#7
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
Well this thread covers everybody.
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#8
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
Are you offering any compensation? Tongue
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#9
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
See, this is wrong.

What you do is kill the people you've insulted and you never have to apologise to anyone ever again.

Have I taught you nothing?

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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#10
RE: Apologies To All I've Ever Insulted
(November 6, 2017 at 6:42 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: See, this is wrong.

What you do is kill the people you've insulted and you never have to apologise to anyone ever again.

Have I taught you nothing?

If it's wrong is it also an insult?

Run Hammy, RUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNN.
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental. 
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