The friend zone is the worst place to ever be in ever.

[Sakumofo]

Im probably one of the .01% of females that is stuck in here. Im kind of used to unrequited love though. For the past two and a half years I wasted time wishing for my math teacher, and as bad as that was I always knew nothing would come out of it.
Now that Ive moved on I like one of my guy friends. I seriously doubt he'd ever go out with me. I thought we could be together even though he's younger, but his dad is the schools psychology teacher. My other friend told me his dad doesnt like interracial couples. -_-
I was afraid he would share his dad's beliefs, but finally decided to just go for it and ask him to homecoming. Well he said no because hes going to a holloween amusement park that weekend. He said he would've gone with me if he was staying here that weekend. As happy as that makes me, I still doubt he sees me as anything other then a friend. Especially since hes just a nice person to everyone.

But I'm done ranting, anyone else, male or female, going through the same thing. I just want to know how you guys deal with it.
I like to think how our relationship can never end because it never started.... then I feel bad.

[Violet]

Masturbation. Lots and lots of unsatisfying masturbation. And that's when shampoo bottles come into the picture

Homecoming isn't the end-all answer to the start of relationships. I'd spend more time with said individual if possible, convey (tastefully, mind) that you're interested (subtlety and patience go a long ways), and if it feels natural for both parties: it'll happen.

If it doesn't feel natural, I wouldn't force the issue. (/whore's hypocrisy)

But really, and to the point: the man said that he would have gone with you <save an extenuating circumstance>. What this means? There's a potential to be tapped into. Don't give up hope when the flat 'no' hasn't come in yet I mean, really: there is absolutely zero reason to get all self-depreciating and melancholy over this. Like, less than zero. Negative reason. Reasoning in the red. I mean, you shouldn't obsess over any one particular person really, but this option hasn't even come into its own yet

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lL2ZwXj1tXM

^^^^^
Lies and ignorance, but the post needed a word-break. I don't know what these two sentences are even for. What am I doing with my life?!

So yeah. The friend zone. You're not in it, yet Said zone comes into play with statements such as 'well you're attractive and all, but I don't want it to hurt our friendship' and 'Steve, you know I love you... just... not in that way. Dude, seriously: put your dick away.'

[Sakumofo]

Thanks, there is still hope then. I'll keep masturbation in mind just in case though.

[Violet]

Thanks, there is still hope then. I'll keep masturbation in mind just in case though.

I am gladdened in the knowing that you've got everything in hand.

You can tell it's been a while since I was actively here. I must be making up for all the time I've been gone. So, since I'm being sentimental now, and this is all about hopes and dreams and shit:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjE126KvPZI

Diana Ross, yo.

[Brian37]

Im probably one of the .01% of females that is stuck in here. Im kind of used to unrequited love though. For the past two and a half years I wasted time wishing for my math teacher, and as bad as that was I always knew nothing would come out of it.
Now that Ive moved on I like one of my guy friends. I seriously doubt he'd ever go out with me. I thought we could be together even though he's younger, but his dad is the schools psychology teacher. My other friend told me his dad doesnt like interracial couples. -_-
I was afraid he would share his dad's beliefs, but finally decided to just go for it and ask him to homecoming. Well he said no because hes going to a holloween amusement park that weekend. He said he would've gone with me if he was staying here that weekend. As happy as that makes me, I still doubt he sees me as anything other then a friend. Especially since hes just a nice person to everyone.

But I'm done ranting, anyone else, male or female, going through the same thing. I just want to know how you guys deal with it.
I like to think how our relationship can never end because it never started.... then I feel bad.

I can identify. Especially when I was a teen in high school. Dorky and awkward looking and low self esteem at the time. I really and STUPIDLY thought pining after women from a distance or throwing myself at them would "show" them my "love". I know now that was my hormones, not love.

You cant dwell in the shadows and never take risks as far as making a first move. Life for most people involves multiple attempts and failure. I only had 3 serious relationships that all ended and a marriage that ended as well.

But I did enjoy them for the time I had them and if I had never taken the risk of asking them out, that would have been 3 relationships I never would have had.

You cant fear rejection otherwise you will be paralyzed with fear and that simply is not healthy.

I also don't think it is healthy to simply want a relationship just to have one. Lots of people get involved in unhealthy relationships that end up abusive physically or even merely mentally. And break ups can be childishly jealous and even bitter to the point of "getting even" in courts or holding child custody hostage as an issue.

There is no "script" or "utopia" relationship, nor even when you get into one should you merely stay in it for emotional reasons.

Don't seek a relationship merely based on want, or physical attraction. Relationships are work and love is more than desire and deeper than physical attraction. And even initial "like minded" attraction isn't always the lynchpin to long term relationships. Sometimes people click at first then over time find that they were not as on the "same page" or even grow apart through no fault of either party.

You also have to know yourself and most importantly be yourself. You don't have to give up your autonomy (right to be yourself).

You also have to let go when you do get into a relationship when you know it is not working out.

I'd say with the way you put this paragraph, my best advice for you would be to work on you being happy first, before you seek someone else. And if you do ask someone else out, and they reject you, it isn't you personally, that is simply the way life works.

[Nine]

Could be worse. At least you have friends.

[kılıç_mehmet]

Never been friendzoned.
To be friendzoned, you yourself must accept to be in the friendzone. Like, you've been "friendzoned" and you are keen on not breaking contact, staying as "friends" is enough for you, you have been friendzoned. I on the other hand, do not accept such a position. If someone friendzones me, I simply remove them from my zone of friends and associates. Meaning, I do not talk to them, answer their phones, messages over facebook, or etc. My reasoning is simple. It is not wise to be friends with someone who you've viewed as something more than friends, like perhaps not like the love of your life, but even short term dating is usually enough.
My advice break any and all relations.
Why really have any relations besides those you've set your eyes on? Defend your pride, friend. But be prepared, because people will start to dislike you for this behavior.
I don't know about guys, guys usually don't hold such grudges, but girls sure do. Even if they don't want you as boyfriend, they want you as friend so they can call someone when they have no boyfriend. As I have said, men and women can only be friends as long as the attraction between them has never been anything but friends.

[smax]

There are simply too many available and interested people to lose sleep over the few that might not be.

[Kayenneh]

Yup. I was in love with my best friend for years and it killed me every time he got another girlfriend for a couple of weeks and then after they broke up, he was of course depressed and in a foul mood. It hurt so bad that he would date many of the girls in our class, but never me, even though he knew about my feelings. Turns out that it was a blessing in disguise, he's mom is the ultimate Jesus freak and he himself is really religious, so being in a relationship would have been strenuous to say the least. Now he's married to a lovely gal, and we're still good friends, and I think it's better this way.

As an odd girl I can only say that play to your strengths and know what you're looking for. Even though it's so shitty to be alone and always out of love, don't lower your standards. Learn to be confident in yourself and be happy in your own skin, that usually attracts the right kind of people. (Easier said than done, eh..?) In the meantime, masturbate copiously.

[FlyingNarwhal]

Here are my observations about "the friend zone," and maybe they can help you out a little. If you are in the friend zone chances are you haven't been aggressive enough or shown the right cues to be recognized as anything more than a friend. Like Brian said you have to take some degree of risk if you are looking to move out of platonic, and into romantic. It doesn't seem like you are completely in the friend zone, because he said he would have gone with you but it's hard to tell with my limited knowledge of your situation if he was willing to go with as a friend or as a possible romantic partner. Either way, there are two main ways to move the situation forward.

First is to give him some cues, which as a guy he will pick up on. A) Be more physical. When you're hanging out, make physical contact with him more than you usually would. Give him a hug or some shit when you meet up and another when you leave. Brush up against him more often. B) Talk (or really text) him more. Step up the amount of times you would talk or text him. He said he is out of town this weekend, well text him a bit and try and strike up some convo. But be careful not to overdo it too much, because if I am constantly receiving texts from a girl all day it stops being cute and becomes annoying. At the end of the day what you are really trying to do is hint at your interest towards him, and usually us guys are pretty good at picking up on those cues.

The second way is to go past cues, and just be more aggressive. Personally I like this way, because the whole cues thing just seems like females' way to get us guys to show feelings first. But your still in school where I assume the norm is for the guy to ask the girl out, so I wouldn't hold it against you if you went that route. But to be more aggressive is really to just be more honest. Tell him you like him as more than a friend. Be open with your feelings toward him and put it on the line. The risk of rejection is far greater here, but it is done quick and simply. And if the guy you are after is not good at picking up cues, you might just have to resort to this anyways.

Last resort you can always try and fuck him....I've seen that work plenty of times.