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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 4:33 pm
See, that's precisely the sort of thing that gives me hope - it bothers you that you might inadvertently have been rude. Even more, you're upset that someone might have noticed you being rude (even though, in all probability, you weren't).
It's that sort of foundationless guilt that may save us all.
Boru
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 4:38 pm
Computers, computer security, the Internet, encryption, math. I feel like I could talk about any of those subjects for hours.
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 4:40 pm
(This post was last modified: August 19, 2018 at 4:41 pm by BrianSoddingBoru4.)
(August 19, 2018 at 4:38 pm)Tiberius Wrote: Computers, computer security, the Internet, encryption, math. I feel like I could talk about any of those subjects for hours.
Not to me you couldn't. The glazed look in my eye generally manifests about 30 seconds in to those topics. Puts people off.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 6:17 pm
(August 19, 2018 at 4:33 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: See, that's precisely the sort of thing that gives me hope - it bothers you that you might inadvertently have been rude. Even more, you're upset that someone might have noticed you being rude (even though, in all probability, you weren't).
It's that sort of foundationless guilt that may save us all.
Boru
I take it you're the same then?
I guess I just see focus on politeness and manners as a British trait or stereotype, or at least a British ideal. (Not saying other places don't value it as well, just saying that since I'm British I recognise it my culture) So I wouldn't say I think it's foundationless; ie manners and politeness are taught, so they prosper wherever they are valued enough to be so taught, and don't where they are not. And guilt goes hand in hand with those rules being taught. I can't say I see much rudeness around where I live; people hold the door open for me just as much as I do for them etc. But I agree it's not universal, and there will always be people that don't care about it, but I personally don't see much cause for concern, at least around my area.
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 6:28 pm
Please and thank you, plus holding doors for people seem to be fairly passé here in the US. I do these, but a lot of people don't. Where I used to live (in Los Angeles) people were just downright rude. I could hold a door for someone and not get a "thank you". I say "you're welcome", anyway. Maybe they'll get it, who knows.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 6:31 pm
(August 19, 2018 at 2:17 pm)Crossless2.0 Wrote: Little baby ducks, old pickup trucks, and rain . . .
I know the song and that's just ICK! You need to find a cave.
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental.
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 6:33 pm
(August 19, 2018 at 6:17 pm)emjay Wrote: (August 19, 2018 at 4:33 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: See, that's precisely the sort of thing that gives me hope - it bothers you that you might inadvertently have been rude. Even more, you're upset that someone might have noticed you being rude (even though, in all probability, you weren't).
It's that sort of foundationless guilt that may save us all.
Boru
I take it you're the same then?
I guess I just see focus on politeness and manners as a British trait or stereotype, or at least a British ideal. (Not saying other places don't value it as well, just saying that since I'm British I recognise it my culture) So I wouldn't say I think it's foundationless; ie manners and politeness are taught, so they prosper wherever they are valued enough to be so taught, and don't where they are not. And guilt goes hand in hand with those rules being taught. I can't say I see much rudeness around where I live; people hold the door open for me just as much as I do for them etc. But I agree it's not universal, and there will always be people that don't care about it, but I personally don't see much cause for concern, at least around my area.
Very much the same, yes. I have this perpetual uneasiness of being impolite, even unintentionally.
It may indeed be a Britishism. I was legally British (grew up in Northern Ireland), but we thought of ourselves as Irish, not British. My parents impressed on us - not in so many words, more by example - that if you don't behave well towards other people, you can hardly expect them to behave well towards you. My father was a terrific proponent of treating people decently, politely and fairly. He also stressed than this can be done without having it seen as an invitation for other people to walk all over you.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 7:04 pm
(August 19, 2018 at 6:31 pm)mh.brewer Wrote: (August 19, 2018 at 2:17 pm)Crossless2.0 Wrote: Little baby ducks, old pickup trucks, and rain . . .
I know the song and that's just ICK! You need to find a cave.
What, you don’t like smarmy cliches?!?
Besides, it’s much too late for the cave to do me, or those who deal with me, any good.
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 7:16 pm
(This post was last modified: August 19, 2018 at 7:19 pm by J a c k.)
(August 19, 2018 at 6:28 pm)Fireball Wrote: Please and thank you, plus holding doors for people seem to be fairly passé here in the US. I do these, but a lot of people don't. Where I used to live (in Los Angeles) people were just downright rude. I could hold a door for someone and not get a "thank you". I say "you're welcome", anyway. Maybe they'll get it, who knows.
I’m the same way. I’m very much a gentleman and people tend to be rude. This post actually came up in my “memories” posts on fb today. I posted it back in 2015, but it’s pretty normal for stuff like this to happen here.
I open doors, pull out chairs, carry heavier stuff, wait until they’re inside their house before driving away, walk them to their car (especially at night), etc. Feels good to be polite, man.
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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RE: What Are You Passionate About?
August 19, 2018 at 7:21 pm
(August 19, 2018 at 6:33 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: (August 19, 2018 at 6:17 pm)emjay Wrote: I take it you're the same then?
I guess I just see focus on politeness and manners as a British trait or stereotype, or at least a British ideal. (Not saying other places don't value it as well, just saying that since I'm British I recognise it my culture) So I wouldn't say I think it's foundationless; ie manners and politeness are taught, so they prosper wherever they are valued enough to be so taught, and don't where they are not. And guilt goes hand in hand with those rules being taught. I can't say I see much rudeness around where I live; people hold the door open for me just as much as I do for them etc. But I agree it's not universal, and there will always be people that don't care about it, but I personally don't see much cause for concern, at least around my area.
Very much the same, yes. I have this perpetual uneasiness of being impolite, even unintentionally.
It may indeed be a Britishism. I was legally British (grew up in Northern Ireland), but we thought of ourselves as Irish, not British. My parents impressed on us - not in so many words, more by example - that if you don't behave well towards other people, you can hardly expect them to behave well towards you. My father was a terrific proponent of treating people decently, politely and fairly. He also stressed than this can be done without having it seen as an invitation for other people to walk all over you.
Boru
I can't say exactly how I was taught it... probably the same as you, by example... ie social psychology at play I guess, both from my parents (who are both very polite and kind), and the culture I grew up in. But I think it may also be related to how my mind works, because apparently when I was a kid one of my babysitters said they'd never met a more polite child. And I think it's possibly because I recognise certain Aspie-like traits in my thinking regarding rules... when I was growing up if there was a sign that said "don't walk on the grass" I'd take it very literally and rigidly, and would under no circumstances do it, even if my life depended on it. But as time has gone on, my thinking has become more flexible and less black and white in that regard; it is still black and white to a large extent, but it recognises a lot more context, nuance, and shades of grey than it used to. But ultimately it does kind of 'snap to grid' as it were, preferring rules to the lack of them.
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