Discussion w/ a Theist RE: Premarital Sex

[Dystopia]

It doesn't surprise that someone who doesn't require proof to believe in supernatural beings equally requires none regarding marriage.

[StealthySkeptic]

Where?! Let me at em, let me at em!

Threads 'q about arguments of gods existence' and 'evolution facts', last pages. I'm going to sleep so keep it going for me.

[Ravenshire]

I'll also be speaking in non-descript terms about sex so as not to assume heternormativity.

[emphasis is mine]

Non-descriptive?!? Fuck that. I really don't want my kids getting suckered into doing things because they never heard of it, straight, gay or bi (got a bi daughter). If the first time they ever heard the terms "anal sex," "bob job," "tossing salad," or the like was in the back seat of little Johnny's car on a Friday night then I failed as a parent. My job (at their current ages) is to prepare them for the world, not protect them from it. Well, mostly anyway. No dad ever truly quits protecting his babies. My kids have heard of more sex stuff (not graphically, but descriptively) than most hookers and know more names for cocks and pussies than most 22-year old sailors. They're also both unbelievers! One a self proclaimed atheist, the other a self proclaimed agnostic that doesn't "really know what I believe, but I'm pretty sure it's not that."

Same goes for drugs/alcohol, the real world of working for a living, how some guys are just plain assholes and some girls are just fucking cunts. I tossed the taboo out on it's ass a long time ago.

George Carlin is an educational tool in my house!

[StealthySkeptic]

I'll also be speaking in non-descript terms about sex so as not to assume heternormativity.

[emphasis is mine]

Non-descriptive?!? Fuck that. I really don't want my kids getting suckered into doing things because they never heard of it, straight, gay or bi (got a bi daughter). If the first time they ever heard the terms "anal sex," "bob job," "tossing salad," or the like was in the back seat of little Johnny's car on a Friday night then I failed as a parent. My job (at their current ages) is to prepare them for the world, not protect them from it. Well, mostly anyway. No dad ever truly quits protecting his babies. My kids have heard of more sex stuff (not graphically, but descriptively) than most hookers and know more names for cocks and pussies than most 22-year old sailors. They're also both unbelievers! One a self proclaimed atheist, the other a self proclaimed agnostic that doesn't "really know what I believe, but I'm pretty sure it's not that."

Same goes for drugs/alcohol, the real world of working for a living, how some guys are just plain assholes and some girls are just fucking cunts. I tossed the taboo out on it's ass a long time ago.

George Carlin is an educational tool in my house!

While I'm quoting this for truth, I meant non-descript terms in terms of gender. Like I will always use "person" instead of just "girl or guy." The former does not presume your child is straight. Or am I completely off base?

[Dystopia]

I'll also be speaking in non-descript terms about sex so as not to assume heternormativity.

[emphasis is mine]

Non-descriptive?!? Fuck that. I really don't want my kids getting suckered into doing things because they never heard of it, straight, gay or bi (got a bi daughter). If the first time they ever heard the terms "anal sex," "bob job," "tossing salad," or the like was in the back seat of little Johnny's car on a Friday night then I failed as a parent. My job (at their current ages) is to prepare them for the world, not protect them from it. Well, mostly anyway. No dad ever truly quits protecting his babies. My kids have heard of more sex stuff (not graphically, but descriptively) than most hookers and know more names for cocks and pussies than most 22-year old sailors. They're also both unbelievers! One a self proclaimed atheist, the other a self proclaimed agnostic that doesn't "really know what I believe, but I'm pretty sure it's not that."

Same goes for drugs/alcohol, the real world of working for a living, how some guys are just plain assholes and some girls are just fucking cunts. I tossed the taboo out on it's ass a long time ago.

George Carlin is an educational tool in my house!

My dad once told me if I wanted to have my first time with a hooker he would pay... Best...dad...Ever

[Elskidor]

I'd say less than 1% actually practice no sex before marriage. It's hard to fight what comes natural, and what is the point in going against nature? Of course you want to test the waters of the person you are going to be engaging in sex acts with for the rest of your life.

Back when I dated or whatever I did enforce waiting, because I wanted it to feel more meaningful but we never waited more than a few months. I would never have dreamt of marrying a girl I had not even slept with, the same way I would not have considered staying with someone who wanted to get jiggy with it in the first two weeks.

For me it was always no marriage before sex and no one night stands or racing my way to the sack. A fair medium I think.

[StealthySkeptic]

I'd say less than 1% actually practice no sex before marriage. It's hard to fight what comes natural, and what is the point in going against nature? Of course you want to test the waters of the person you are going to be engaging in sex acts with for the rest of your life.

Back when I dated or whatever I did enforce waiting, because I wanted it to feel more meaningful but we never waited more than a few months. I would never have dreamt of marrying a girl I had not even slept with, the same way I would not have considered staying with someone who wanted to get jiggy with it in the first two weeks.

For me it was always no marriage before sex and no one night stands or racing my way to the sack. A fair medium I think.

I should think so. The thought has occasionally crossed my mind that it's just my luck to have only dated girls who want to wait before marriage.

[bennyboy]

I haven't read this whole thread, but I want to address the OP title.


My wife was a virgin when we got married. For ME, that's been very important-- when we've had arguments, even big ones, the fact that she was mine and only mine really made sure I got over the stress and worked things out. If I had been #53, then I'm not sure I wouldn't have walked a couple times. For HER, I can imagine it's made a difference, too. There were a couple times when we were younger that I was so out of control, so aggressive, that she probably SHOULD have left me. But since I was her first and in her mind only, she stuck with me and over the years the rough edges have worn off.

Now, after all the BS, we can say we've stuck it out, and we have a beautiful and harmonious family. I really think the fact that she had no premarital experience played a role in keeping us together.

---

I'd say less than 1% actually practice no sex before marriage.

Only in Western culture. In Eastern cultures, there are millions and millions who haven't had any sexual experience beyond kissing before they get married. In Korea, for example, extended virginity is definitely the norm (although this is changing these days).

[Chad32]

I haven't read this whole thread, but I want to address the OP title.


My wife was a virgin when we got married. For ME, that's been very important-- when we've had arguments, even big ones, the fact that she was mine and only mine really made sure I got over the stress and worked things out. If I had been #53, then I'm not sure I wouldn't have walked a couple times. For HER, I can imagine it's made a difference, too. There were a couple times when we were younger that I was so out of control, so aggressive, that she probably SHOULD have left me. But since I was her first and in her mind only, she stuck with me and over the years the rough edges have worn off.

Now, after all the BS, we can say we've stuck it out, and we have a beautiful and harmonious family. I really think the fact that she had no premaritaxl experience played a role in keeping us together.

---

I'd say less than 1% actually practice no sex before marriage.

Only in Western culture. In Eastern cultures, there are millions and millions who haven't had any sexual experience beyond kissing before they get married. In Korea, for example, extended virginity is definitely the norm (although this is changing these days).

Different strokes for different folks. It would be stupid to say that you can't still have a happy marriage just because you didn't have sex or live with each other first.

probably because they'd be killed if they did have premarital sex.

[Ravenshire]

While I'm quoting this for truth, I meant non-descript terms in terms of gender. Like I will always use "person" instead of just "girl or guy." The former does not presume your child is straight. Or am I completely off base?

Nah. I just misread what you meant about non-descriptive. I took it to mean talking about sex without getting too descriptive. I get what your saying now.