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Starbucks Red cups and the "War on Christmas".
#19
RE: Starbucks Red cups and the "War on Christmas".
(November 10, 2015 at 1:34 pm)Thumpalumpacus Wrote: I can confirm that it's true. I have ordered the 31st Starbucks Division to deliver a flanking attack with its Printshop Brigade in order to loosen the Christian grip on Hill 457 with its crucial terrain feature, Nativity Gulch. They are receiving air support from the 355th MSNBC Squadron. We anticipate full control of Nativity Gulch within the next 48 hours, and are hopeful of capturing the Christian commander there, said to be General Joseph.

Onward, atheist soldiers!

Outstanding work, General!

On my front, I can confirm that the Corporate Christmas Commandos (the fightin' 12/25th) will target several Chick-Fil-A franchises, where they will openly eat McDonald's chicken nuggets (their training to live off scraps of shit will come in handy here) while making derisive remarks about Mary's alleged virginity (e.g., "I'll bet that bitch was a fine little piece of chicken") before heading off to Hobby Lobby for further highly classified mayhem.
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Messages In This Thread
Starbucks Red cups and the "War on Christmas". - by Aroura - November 10, 2015 at 3:30 am
RE: Starbucks Red cups and the "War on Christmas". - by AFTT47 - November 10, 2015 at 12:43 pm
RE: Starbucks Red cups and the "War on Christmas". - by Crossless1 - November 10, 2015 at 1:48 pm

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