Problem dealing with death as an atheist

[reverendjeremiah]

Im an atheist that used to work at a cemetary. Did you know black men turn white and white men turn black after they have fermented for a couple of weeks? Did you know that dead humans smell like rotten fish guts with a very noticeable "honey" sickly sweet smell? Did you know that if you smell dead bodies for more than a few minutes you will get a chemical burn in your nostrels that will not go away for at least 36 hours? Yes, you still smell that same dead body your entire weekend even though you have been home for 2 days...well..I could keep going, but it gets a bit nastier and nastier.

Fear of death is something ingrained into our species to ensure passing of the genes to the next offspring. So fear of death actually has biological benefits, for many obvious reasons. Also, what you say about death is very much what many different departments of the science have confirmed. Your thoughts are processed by your brain. Once your brain dies, your ego ceases to exist. You will not even know that you are dead.

Now, I know to some people that this can seem very frightening, but let me give you some tips I used to get over my small amount of frustration I had for the topic:

#1 - dont hide from the topic of death right now. Dont run from it right now. Right now is a crucial time for you. Learn as much as you can about the biology and science dealing with death. Learn as much as you can. Knowledge is power. Empower yourself on the topic before you come to any conclusions...unless you are already knowledgable, then skip to the next one.

#2 - Once you have some info on what happens to the body and brain in death, and why fear of death is a biological property in our species, then it is time to start running down lists of priorities of why you are so much more afraid of death than normal and run them through to their honest conclusion wether you like their outcome or not. You must be VERY honest with yourself and not coddle yourself with deluding and feel good lies. Example:
- Why do I fear death?
- I fear it because I will not be able to acknowledge to myself that I am dead.
- Why is that acknowledgement of my own death is important to me?
deeply analyse your wants and needs and fears when it comes to death so that you know what is important, and what is trivial.

#3 - Once you have that mental list of your priorities, ask yourself if they are realistic. "Is it realistic of me to want to live forever?" Wanting to live forever does nothing more than add extra emotional backage to an already crappy situation. Not only are you afraid of death, but you want to live forever, something you cannot possibly attain. Worrying about things that are unnecesary does nothing but add more emotional stress. Come to terms with your mental list of priorities, prune the unnecesary bagage, and accept reality for what it is.

Have you ever been put under for surgery? That is pretty much what death will be like.

#4 - Try to find positive things about death. My personal favorite solice in death is that I will finally attain perfect peace. No need for food, water, bathroom breaks, no joy, no pain, no politics, no religion, no thinking, no me, just peaceful oblivion. Its okay to be afraid of death, but dont let it ruin your life here and now. I dont want to die, but after I am dead it will no longer matter to me. I will fight to stay alive, but if I lose that fight then I did the best I could.

#5 - If you ever find yourself going back and rediscussing your fears of death again, try this mental exercise:

"The universe is 13.5 billion years old. For 13.5 billion years I NEVER EXISTED. It didnt hurt me one bit. In fact, I didnt even notice it. When I am dead, it will be the same as before I was born"

I take solice in that mental exercise. After a while you will realize that you no longer need to wrry about it so much, and focus on living and enjoying your life, right here, right now.