To kill a mocking depression

[J a c k]

In my case reason does help. A lot.
I'm capable of analyzing the present, how the past has shaped my circumstances and what I have to do to crawl out. Reason is my best armor.

I love your responses, robvalue!

Do you have to document the past to make sure it squares and your depression voice isn't messing with you? Or is that not even a concern? It's not like a memento scenario lite?

No. I know the things that happened and hurt by heart. No need to document. Writing out of inspiration does help, though. : 
I'm a very self aware person. I notice when I'm putting my guard down, and I act on it. You mentioned physical symptoms. I went too long without accepting meds, and some things happened that are somewhat correlated to past traumatic events, and this made me collapse. I'm being normal me (October 2015), chatting with co-workers while the system was down, ignoring my bottled up worries, then bam. Tried to get up. Legs didn't respond. I spent 3 days in the hospital. My heart was racing constantly while there. Trouble breathing. Finally a psychiatrist told me that I have depression (duh) and I need my medication. I said, but beer. He said, meds. After going to therapy, he says I have actual reasons to be like this besides the other stuff (genetics, yey mom and grann), but I'm also self analytical and can help myself. I have forced myself to face my fears. Moved out of a toxic environment. Doing things for myself. Accepting help, because I have to admit, I'm human. Need to stop playing Wonder Woman.