RE: Adoption of mentally impaired babies
January 10, 2017 at 12:06 pm
(This post was last modified: January 10, 2017 at 12:16 pm by c172.)
Gosh, now I'm all curious about the opinions of those that are telling us they decline to weigh in!
Spina bifida, my physical disability, varies greatly from case to case. One one end, there are those (occulta) that may be completely asymptomatic, or may just have back pain. On the other, (myelomeningocele, my form) there is usually paralysis and various malformations of the hips and legs that proclude functioning down there. As well, some cases involve severe impairment of executive function, sometimes to the point of mental retardation (or whatever the PC term for that is nowadays).
The emotional and mental side of parenting a special needs child, in my experience with my mother, biological father, and adopted father, is enormous I don't have a "calling" to be a parent at all (even though my sexual function is intact, AFAIK). Even if I had a son and daughter who were respectively the star quarterback and the captain of the cheerleading squad.
The job of parenting seems like something that is always going to be, at times, bigger than you envision. With special needs as part of the equation, if you haven't located the resources to turn to to help with parenting and other developmental/legal issues (in my case, the Spina Bifida Association, which puts on a National Conference every other year), then I feel like you have no less than a responsibility to either abort the baby or put him/her up for adoption.
And from your previous posts, it does seem like you have some serious moral issues with going forward with such a huge parenting journey. I would never want to see a special needs kid grow up in a family that ended up not loving the child despite their best efforts.
Edit: ignore top sentence. Ninjas!
Spina bifida, my physical disability, varies greatly from case to case. One one end, there are those (occulta) that may be completely asymptomatic, or may just have back pain. On the other, (myelomeningocele, my form) there is usually paralysis and various malformations of the hips and legs that proclude functioning down there. As well, some cases involve severe impairment of executive function, sometimes to the point of mental retardation (or whatever the PC term for that is nowadays).
The emotional and mental side of parenting a special needs child, in my experience with my mother, biological father, and adopted father, is enormous I don't have a "calling" to be a parent at all (even though my sexual function is intact, AFAIK). Even if I had a son and daughter who were respectively the star quarterback and the captain of the cheerleading squad.
The job of parenting seems like something that is always going to be, at times, bigger than you envision. With special needs as part of the equation, if you haven't located the resources to turn to to help with parenting and other developmental/legal issues (in my case, the Spina Bifida Association, which puts on a National Conference every other year), then I feel like you have no less than a responsibility to either abort the baby or put him/her up for adoption.
And from your previous posts, it does seem like you have some serious moral issues with going forward with such a huge parenting journey. I would never want to see a special needs kid grow up in a family that ended up not loving the child despite their best efforts.
Edit: ignore top sentence. Ninjas!
"For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring." - Carl Sagan
