A story I like to tell when someone is very pushy on me burning in Hell fits this topic thread well. I dont tell it to every fundy I meet, because I prefer to pick and choose my fights. This particular opinionated scenario of mine is a wild card I hold up my sleeve for the particularly diabolical fundies:
"I believe if, when I die, and I happen to see YOUR type of god standing before me..YOUR Jesus...YOUR Jehovah...standing in judgement over the masses, that I will immediately run up to that God and bid him to explain his lack of communication. Why so quiet? Why allow such violent and disturbed people to claim to speak for you? As soon as this God tries to answer, I will turn around and scream "DEATH TO THE TYRANT!!!" and bum rush this evil god with hopefully as many willing people at my back as possible. I will then pick your pathetic god up over my head and toss him into the very Hell he created to torture his own creation in for his sadistic pleasure...and I would let him stay in Hell for about 2 minutes. Maybe even less. I would reach my hand into that flame and pull Jehovah from it. Yes, I will show kindness and forgiveness. I will then allow those who are in the afterlife to choose what ever they wanted to do."
Hey..if they can make up bullshit and throw out wild claims suggesting that belief is all one need to justify them..then why can I not also toss out some bullshit unto the table as well?
"I believe if, when I die, and I happen to see YOUR type of god standing before me..YOUR Jesus...YOUR Jehovah...standing in judgement over the masses, that I will immediately run up to that God and bid him to explain his lack of communication. Why so quiet? Why allow such violent and disturbed people to claim to speak for you? As soon as this God tries to answer, I will turn around and scream "DEATH TO THE TYRANT!!!" and bum rush this evil god with hopefully as many willing people at my back as possible. I will then pick your pathetic god up over my head and toss him into the very Hell he created to torture his own creation in for his sadistic pleasure...and I would let him stay in Hell for about 2 minutes. Maybe even less. I would reach my hand into that flame and pull Jehovah from it. Yes, I will show kindness and forgiveness. I will then allow those who are in the afterlife to choose what ever they wanted to do."
Hey..if they can make up bullshit and throw out wild claims suggesting that belief is all one need to justify them..then why can I not also toss out some bullshit unto the table as well?
