Considering atheism [Currently Christian]

[*Deidre*]

Well, when I look back over the past five years of going from belief to disbelief to belief (leaving out a lot of details of course) I would say that emotionally, I wasn't "comfortable" as an atheist and that struggle between my mind and emotions started when my grandmother became ill a few years ago and then passed away. Maybe the main delineating line between belief and lack of belief comes in the form of wanting (or needing) to believe vs. being comfortable with the idea that no god exists. My mind and heart never "agreed" when I was an atheist. :/

May I just say how appropriately humble you are regarding your faith.  It sounds like you could slide right back into disbelief if the emotional grounds for your discomfort are ever resolved.  We all have to trust our selves and our process.  You exemplify this.

You're gonna make me cry

There's a reason I return to this site, over and over. Not just because some of you are mad cool lol but my mind likes it here.

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Wish there were a few billion more of deidre and a few billion less frothy believers. 

While I've never been a believer, the faithful disappoint me in their beliefs, in their lack of respect for themselves -or- their beliefs or the stories upon which they are formed.

I think that much of that comes from organized religion and indoctrination. (and fear) 
When you see people like that, they may be struggling more than you know. :/