I once made an emergency meal by boiling tinned tuna (brine or spring water, not the oil abomination) and red kidney beans in a pan of pasta sauce, and served with chips ("fries") from the chippy. Went down an absolute treat. And stayed down, which is the main thing.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'