Phrases and idioms that trigger you.

[Edwardo Piet]

"You wouldn't dare!"

For some reason this reminds me:

Aanother thing that triggers me is . . . partly down to my fault. I'll explain.

I like to do this thing where if someone plays a trick on me and they think I'm super gullible, I pretend to fall for it to show that they're the gullible ones. And then I can be like "Neener neener I never fell for it but you believed I did so you're the gullible one, neener neener." It's childish and silly but it's fun and the practical jokes played on me in the first place are childish and silly too.

The trouble is, my acting works too well, and I can never convince the person that I didn't really fall for it. They strongly convince themselves that I fell for it but won't admit I fell for it and I'm lying. No matter how much I swear that I was playing along and they're the gullible ones. And the fact they genuinely won't believe me and admit THEY'RE the gullible ones TRIGGERS THE FUCKING FUCK OUT OF ME.

. . . I know, I'm weird lol.

I should probably stop doing it. But it's so fun.

My favorite one is on April Fools. Someone will do some really obvious April Fools joke and I'll pretend to be dumb and gullible as fuck and take everything they say literally even though it's obvious as fuck that they're saying something crazy because it's April 1st and I wouldn't even fucking believe it if I knew it wasn't because it's ridiculous. I'm like "Oh, oh wow, REALLY? I didn't know that." and even when I try to be obviously sarcastic they still convince themselves I fell for their joke. And they think I'm lying and being a sore loser when I tell them I didn't fall for it. ADMIT YOU'RE THE DUMB GULLIBLE ONE YOU FUCKING BASTARD HYPOTHETICAL PERSON!

Yeah, it grates one me