I'll volunteer to teach a Bible class at my school.
Sample test:
1. What did Jesus say about homosexuals?
A. We should stone them
B. They are an abomination
C. They are icky
D. He didn't say anything about them. -- CORRECT ANSWER
2. True or False: Jesus loves rich people
FALSE
3. True or False: Moses is generally accepted as a historical figure.
FALSE
4. Does God change his mind?
A. Yes
B. No
C. Scripture says both, so IDK. -- CORECT
5. God vs Iron Chariots, who wins?
A. God
B. Iron Chariots -- CORRECT
C. It's a Tie
D. We all lose
6. Lot offered his daughters to be raped by the people of Sodom. What did God think of this?
A. He was angry, and SMOTE all of Sodom except Lot's daughters.
B. He was angry, and smote only Lot
C. He thought Lot was the only good man in the town, and smote the rest of them -- CORRECT
D. He was angry, but loving--and forgave Lot
7. After Lot offered his daughters up for rape, and God turned his wife into a pillar of salt for turning around for a second, what did Lot's daughters do next?
A. Find husbands with another tribe
B. Died
C. Were smote by God
D. Raped their father and got pregnant by him. -- CORRECT
8. God once killed 70,000 people because King David...
A. Refused to believe in him
B. Murdered 70,000 people himself
C. Asked him to
D. Took a census -- CORRECT
9. Which of these passages are actually in the bible?
A. Happy is the one who seizes your infants and dashes your little ones against the rocks -- CORRECT
B. God helps those who help themselves
C. Cleanliness is next to Godliness
D. God works in mysterious ways
10. ESSAY:
Explain how Adam and Eve's sons had children of their own, enough to produce the population of the world from a bottleneck.
REMEMBER: Eventually god killed everyone else on earth, and created a SECOND bottleneck population with Noah and his three sons.
Sample test:
1. What did Jesus say about homosexuals?
A. We should stone them
B. They are an abomination
C. They are icky
D. He didn't say anything about them. -- CORRECT ANSWER
2. True or False: Jesus loves rich people
FALSE
3. True or False: Moses is generally accepted as a historical figure.
FALSE
4. Does God change his mind?
A. Yes
B. No
C. Scripture says both, so IDK. -- CORECT
5. God vs Iron Chariots, who wins?
A. God
B. Iron Chariots -- CORRECT
C. It's a Tie
D. We all lose
6. Lot offered his daughters to be raped by the people of Sodom. What did God think of this?
A. He was angry, and SMOTE all of Sodom except Lot's daughters.
B. He was angry, and smote only Lot
C. He thought Lot was the only good man in the town, and smote the rest of them -- CORRECT
D. He was angry, but loving--and forgave Lot
7. After Lot offered his daughters up for rape, and God turned his wife into a pillar of salt for turning around for a second, what did Lot's daughters do next?
A. Find husbands with another tribe
B. Died
C. Were smote by God
D. Raped their father and got pregnant by him. -- CORRECT
8. God once killed 70,000 people because King David...
A. Refused to believe in him
B. Murdered 70,000 people himself
C. Asked him to
D. Took a census -- CORRECT
9. Which of these passages are actually in the bible?
A. Happy is the one who seizes your infants and dashes your little ones against the rocks -- CORRECT
B. God helps those who help themselves
C. Cleanliness is next to Godliness
D. God works in mysterious ways
10. ESSAY:
Explain how Adam and Eve's sons had children of their own, enough to produce the population of the world from a bottleneck.
REMEMBER: Eventually god killed everyone else on earth, and created a SECOND bottleneck population with Noah and his three sons.
The whole tone of Church teaching in regard to woman is, to the last degree, contemptuous and degrading. - Elizabeth Cady Stanton
