Time to fire up the log chipper (not for the sensitive or squeamish)

[Rev. Rye]

I met a guy in '75 who worked on a farm. He went to work early and was pushing corn into a grain grinder. An ear got stuck, and he reached to push it in. When he leaned in, his hand got caught, and he was in an unstable position, unable to pull himself out and also unable to push against anything but the chute, which tapered in. He was there, getting his fingers slowly chewed off, until someone else showed up to work and pulled him out. By his own account, that was about an hour and a half, slowly losing finger parts. I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

Which is why I prefer more merciful methods of execution.