Why believe the bible?

[Minimalist]

As best I can gather from this brief survey, the reasons are:

1. The bible says so;
   
2. The bible is internally consistent;
   
3. The bible successfully describes historical events;
   
4. The bible predicted specific archaeological discoveries;
   
5. The bible changes lives;
   
6. Jesus said to believe the bible.
   

1.  Ludicrous at face value.  The koran claims to be inerrant also.  Xhristards would be the first to lose their shit over that.
2.  Not at all true.  Yhwh is a vile, petty, tyrant.  "Jesus" is a wimpy socialist.
3.  Such as?
4.  Such as?
5.  So does a bullet.  So what?
6.  There is no more evidence for fucking jesus than there is to back up the fucking bible.