I've made a conscious decision that my elderly father will die without knowing I don't believe in god. Or heaven. Or hell. It would break his heart to think he will not see me someday in heaven. (Hopefully nobody will "out" me to him against my wishes.) It took me a while to come to terms with that. It felt hypocritical. Someone at TPTSNBN said something that put it in perspective for me and made me feel very "at peace" with that. I WISH I could remember who it was. I WISH I could remember exactly what they said that made it so much better. I WISH I'd copied and pasted that post to my personal files as soon as I read it. I WISH I knew for sure that I thanked them properly. (I doubt it.) Regrets.
Where are we going and why am I in this hand basket?
