My proofs for Islam

[Mystic]

Has it ever occurred to you, MK, to simply live your truest life and let the chips fall?  Rather than seeking out meaning in these things that you clearly struggle with, yourself..to seek out what meaning need not be argued into existence in the first place?  

If you live that truest life, and it's wrong by the judgement of others..even a divine other, then so be it.  Perhaps there will even be a price to pay...but what would you pay for the privilege of being...?

I am sick of myself and don't want to stay like the way it is. Everyone around me constantly praises me, the medical staff constantly think well of me unlike the forums.  In real life, people think really highly of me, my friends, professors, classmates, etc.  But I don't... and won't trick myself I am that mask that I put on.  What I am truly am, lies in how I stand, bow, and prostrate before my Lord in the connection ritual, and how I in tune myself with the name of God therein.  And I have been utter failure and insolent in that regard, as if all my prayers just further me from him where I pay more attention to myself and adore myself more therein then him.