RE: Pitch ideas for Christian movies
July 1, 2019 at 8:23 am
(This post was last modified: July 1, 2019 at 8:30 am by Cecelia.)
Sticks and Stones
In which a good Christian man stones his gay neighbors to death. But the Anti-Christian police force isn't having any of that! They charge the good Christian man with MURDER! There's a big trial, and the prosecutor -- who is an atheist, and LITERALLY THE DEVIL -- pushes for life in prison. The Newsboys and Duck Dynasty get involved and they prove Jesus existed by saying the the bible says he exists, and the bible says it is true, so therefore Jesus did exist, and therefore it's okay to kill homosexuals. The good Christian man is set free by the jury of Christians while the atheist prosecutor is raped by a muslim and then her body is dumped in a river as everyone has a good laugh about how she's in hell.
Sticks and Stones 2
A Good Christian Woman finds out that her sister was raped in the city, but did not scream. She refuses to marry her rapist, so the good Christian woman stones her sister to death. The woman's atheist father is outraged, but he gets cancer. The police have the audacity to investigate the case of her sister's death as a MURDER when it was clearly a RELIGIOUS RITE. The evil Atheist ACLU pushes back against it, but they all get hit by cars. Eventually the community protests, along with the Newsboys, Duck Dynasty, and Bill O'Reilly, and the police stop investigating the case of the murder.
Sticks and Stones 3
In a small town in Alabama (Where else?) several bodies are found in a dumpster. Police investigate it, and believe it to be the work of a serial killer. But it's no serial killer! those people were WORKING ON THE SABBATH. Unfortunately for the good christian, he is put on trial and found guilty by a jury of atheists and muslims. There are protests, but the serial... err good Christian is sentenced to death. But with the help of Roy Moore, Duck Dynasty, the Newsboys, and Jerry Falwell Jr, they're able to convince Governor Kay Ivey to grant a full pardon before stepping down because she's a woman and she shouldn't be given any power. Oh and don't worry about the jury, once the good Christian is released, he murders them all, along with the judge, the prosecutor, and the prosecutors 2 children under the age of 7. Their bodies are strung up at the newsboys concert as the credits roll.
In which a good Christian man stones his gay neighbors to death. But the Anti-Christian police force isn't having any of that! They charge the good Christian man with MURDER! There's a big trial, and the prosecutor -- who is an atheist, and LITERALLY THE DEVIL -- pushes for life in prison. The Newsboys and Duck Dynasty get involved and they prove Jesus existed by saying the the bible says he exists, and the bible says it is true, so therefore Jesus did exist, and therefore it's okay to kill homosexuals. The good Christian man is set free by the jury of Christians while the atheist prosecutor is raped by a muslim and then her body is dumped in a river as everyone has a good laugh about how she's in hell.
Sticks and Stones 2
A Good Christian Woman finds out that her sister was raped in the city, but did not scream. She refuses to marry her rapist, so the good Christian woman stones her sister to death. The woman's atheist father is outraged, but he gets cancer. The police have the audacity to investigate the case of her sister's death as a MURDER when it was clearly a RELIGIOUS RITE. The evil Atheist ACLU pushes back against it, but they all get hit by cars. Eventually the community protests, along with the Newsboys, Duck Dynasty, and Bill O'Reilly, and the police stop investigating the case of the murder.
Sticks and Stones 3
In a small town in Alabama (Where else?) several bodies are found in a dumpster. Police investigate it, and believe it to be the work of a serial killer. But it's no serial killer! those people were WORKING ON THE SABBATH. Unfortunately for the good christian, he is put on trial and found guilty by a jury of atheists and muslims. There are protests, but the serial... err good Christian is sentenced to death. But with the help of Roy Moore, Duck Dynasty, the Newsboys, and Jerry Falwell Jr, they're able to convince Governor Kay Ivey to grant a full pardon before stepping down because she's a woman and she shouldn't be given any power. Oh and don't worry about the jury, once the good Christian is released, he murders them all, along with the judge, the prosecutor, and the prosecutors 2 children under the age of 7. Their bodies are strung up at the newsboys concert as the credits roll.
The whole tone of Church teaching in regard to woman is, to the last degree, contemptuous and degrading. - Elizabeth Cady Stanton
