The Last Movie You Watched

[Rev. Rye]

This week in the Deep Hurting Project, Jonah Hex. I don't know much about the original comics besides what I can look up on TVTRopes. But I know it's bad enough for the Project.

• This scene of a vengeful attempt on Jonah Hex' life would be a lot more impactful if we knew who this guy was.
  
• Is this movie animated now? It's like they decided they wanted to do an opening credits scene, but didn't include the opening credits.
  
• Looking it up on TVTropes, Jonah Hex should be a lot more heavily burnt. Or did they think making him any more heavily burnt would infringe on Nightmare on Elm Street?
  
• I liked the whole "Western anti-hero carrying around a Gat" thing when it was Django doing it.
  
• Um, President Grant? You do remember Sherman, right? That he targeted civilians, too? Then again, Sherman's rationale for razing Atlanta at least made sense. And at least he wasn't doing it to his own people in hopes that they'd turn against Richmond.
  
• Huh. Jonah's a Confederate. And to think that, in a few years, making the hero a Confederate would become a major taboo (for admittedly damn good reasons.)
  
• The tekegraph is the way of the future? It's been running nationwide for 15 fucking years at this point.
  
• And why is there a monster/man MMA fight? 
  
• What the shit kind of second chance could there be for the Confederacy? The Union trounced your ass the first time around, many of your best generals are dead, and by the end, you were so desperate for troops that you were actually willing to try and bring slaves into your army, thus undermining the entire fucking point of the rebellion in the first place.
  
• So, the only reason he joined the Confederacy was because he had ODD?
  
• So, Eli Whitney made the A-bomb? Or at least the Steampunk version thereof?
  
• Also, why does Grant look fuck-all like Grant?
  
• One of the most commonly cited flaws of this film is that it's short. Fortunately, for my purposes, it's one of its strengths. Dinner starts soon and I nodded off through a lot of the afternoon, so it's ending just in time.
  

Next Week, After QuaRENTine.