@FallentoReason, I do not see how you can blame God. I do see you can kick yourself in the butt for reading more into the situation than was there. It's one of those life things that happen, believe me I know, I at one time wanted to play "Let's Make a Deal" with God over a girl. Now that I've grown wiser with years, I can look back and see that God is not necessarily in the deal making business. Why, because He is omniscient, knowing all, so He does not need to be second guessed by mere mortals.
God loves those who believe and those who do not and the same goes for me, you have no choice in this matter. That puts the matter of total free will to rest.
