(August 29, 2012 at 2:34 am)greneknight Wrote: I'm very sorry to read of the death of your wife. I'm sorry I made light of what you said when you said you didn't sleep because of your condition. I really thought it was one of those excuses that I've heard from my friends when they're caught online at weird hours by an adult. If I had known it was a bereavement of this nature, I would not have mentioned it. Time will heal all this.
Please don't feel bad, there was no real way for you to have known unless you'd been around long enough to have got caught up in it all. I certainly wasn't offended by anything you wrote, I didn't see it as you making light of the situation, but I just thought it's something you needed to know. Yes, they do say time is a great healer; I don't wish to sound as depressive as I often feel, it's just that I think there are some wounds far too grievous ever to heal and I fear this is one of those. Having my sweet, sweet Princess stolen from me and certainly with no warning is the single most personal thing that Life has ever done against me.
I do have to correct you on one point, however. Sam was my fiancée, we never got the chance to be husband and wife.
(August 29, 2012 at 2:34 am)greneknight Wrote: I have a friend who died of leukemia. He was in a lot of pain and he prayed for God to take away the pain. But he continued to be in pain. At that time, I was going to take a music exam (you probably know the ABRSM graded exams) and my mum knew I'd be very nervous because I had to play 3 pieces from different pieces and the last one was a technically challenging piece. My mum asked me to just say a quick prayer before going in to face the examiner.
But I refused to say any prayer because I thought if God didn't even relieve my friend of his horrible pain, I shouldn't bog God down with another prayer and let's face it - it's a bit silly to pray for my music performance when my friend's prayers are obviously higher on God's priority list. So I played without bothering with a prayer to this God who was neglecting my friend. As it turned out, I did very well in my performance but my friend continued to be in pain and he died months later a horrible death. God did bugger all for him. I mentioned this in Christian Forums and everyone was livid. They said I was childish to treat God like a chap behind the wish-list counter. Some said I was a troll and I was trying to attack Christianity. Most of them insisted I was a much older man out to harm the faithful.
But the truth is I was glad I didn't pray before my exam. I would have felt bad because it would mean God answered my prayer for something frivolous but he didn't care one bit for my dying friend. Not even alleviate his pain.
I am so sorry to learn of the death of your friend. All death is abhorrent to me, unnatural or untimely death even more so. In my own case, I am so very glad that no-one has offered to pray about the situation; I'm not by nature a violent or even a vindictive person but in all honesty I don't know how I would react to anyone saying such things to my face, after what happened. Perhaps people pick up on this subconsciously, leastwise the few people I still speak to anyway. I have had people giving the odd religiously-motivated platitude, you know the sort of thing I'm sure: "She's in a better place/God's hands now", or "Everyone has their time to die, obviously this was her time". That last was said to me by someone who was meant to be giving me bereavement counselling and I felt like punching her self-satisfied face in. I'm sure like other people she thought she was being comforting; I just see it as deeply and personally insulting.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
