whateverist Wrote:The odd thing was that I couldn't really feel anything directly. I was somehow removed from it all and numb. In some ways it's like I never came back, I just moved on.
I can understand this. A friend of mine took his life ten years ago, and it devastated me. I eventually started to cope with it when another good friend of mine passed away. Again, I was devastated, and my brain seemed to unconsciously realize that if I get so emotionally attached to things in life that can disappear at any time, it would kill me. Ever since then, I have felt that the emotional connection I used to feel towards others is muted, even going as far that I no longer feel the same extreme level of empathy I used to feel towards others. It's not that I don't care about others anymore, it's just that I used to have a level of empathy that seemed to be unnatural, and now I've leveled off more to a point that seems to be consistent with those around me.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
