RE: Bipolar 2 Disorder
January 31, 2013 at 3:23 pm
(This post was last modified: January 31, 2013 at 3:26 pm by Creed of Heresy.)
Mania is the state of mind of elation and energy, and hypomania is the exact opposite, the state of mind of depression and lethargy. I have bouts of mania followed by episodes of depression that go in a 1/7 ratio for length of duration. If I could constantly have mania I would be so happy, no pun intended. When I am manic, I feel very invigorated, confident, and productive. The rest of the time, lately, it's a struggle to even get myself to take a shower daily. I used to love bathing, and I still do, but whereas I always kept a sort of schedule of it, now I have this thing where I'll forego it for a day, and if I REALLY feel like shit I won't bathe for two or three days. On top of that I will despise the very idea of going to work, while in truth I actually don't mind working once I get to my job. When I hit those lows, doing anything, even things I enjoy, feel like unwanted chores and wastes of time.
For example, a few days ago I was semi-manic. I was eager to work, I did a bunch of writing, I did a bunch of cleaning around the place, I was posting energetically etc etc etc. Now the last few days I'm back in the depression. Topics I was discussing I have lost interest in. My mood is considerably worse. I am irritable, touchy, and snarky. The last couple days it has been, again, a task just to go to work. Once there, it's mostly fine since I can lose myself in the constant tasks but trying to get myself to start them is a pain in the ass.
I'm getting sick of this. It's been this way for five years now and I just want it over with. If it's because I have B2D, and it can treated with medication, then all engines full ahead, I just want to make sure whatever the hell it is gets treated properly.
For example, a few days ago I was semi-manic. I was eager to work, I did a bunch of writing, I did a bunch of cleaning around the place, I was posting energetically etc etc etc. Now the last few days I'm back in the depression. Topics I was discussing I have lost interest in. My mood is considerably worse. I am irritable, touchy, and snarky. The last couple days it has been, again, a task just to go to work. Once there, it's mostly fine since I can lose myself in the constant tasks but trying to get myself to start them is a pain in the ass.
I'm getting sick of this. It's been this way for five years now and I just want it over with. If it's because I have B2D, and it can treated with medication, then all engines full ahead, I just want to make sure whatever the hell it is gets treated properly.
