RE: Americas child death shame
July 13, 2013 at 10:33 am
(This post was last modified: July 13, 2013 at 10:47 am by Psykhronic.)
(July 11, 2013 at 3:00 pm)pineapplebunnybounce Wrote: Some people just aren't meant to be parents. But a lot of people don't get that, and the decision to not have kids is not a popular one. I've had so many people try to convince me otherwise, and all with ridiculous (and infuriating) reasons like:
1. but what about your parents? you're not going to give them grandchildren?
2. but don't you want to leave something behind?
3. what if your husband/bf really wants kids?
4. who's going to take care of you when you're old?
5. you can't always travel and hangout with friends, one day they'll have their families and you'll be all alone.
6. why don't you think you'll be happy with children? once you have one you'll LOVE it.
7. adoption is not the same as having your own. (when i say i'll never risk pregnancy if i change my mind, since there are kids that already need parents out there)
8. you'll regret it and it'll be too late (and this one is SO POPULAR)
And this may just be my own experience, but only other people who don't want kids have ever understood my position. Anyone who's already had kids, or wants kids, will try to talk me out of it. Which is hilarious because I'm often so busy that when I get home around 9-10pm, I just want to watch some shows and crash. Imagine if there's a crying baby, I'll go nuts.
I think people should understand that babies take up 18 years of your life at least, if you're lucky. Sure there are people who love to be parents and devote their lives to their children. And that's great. But not everyone can make a commitment like that, and you may not have done a good thing, when you convince someone who has doubts to have a kid.
When I was about four years old I decided, whilst walking to the store with my mom, that I did not want children. Ever. She was telling me all this heartwarming stuff about bearing children, because I asked about it, and I asked her immediately if there was a way to ensure I would not get pregnant. She told me about tubals and I said I was going to get that done. I also figured I wouldn't get married either, because fuck that.
My mom has been pretty decent about my decision, a lot of people though were pretty harsh to me especially when I was younger. It's hard too when I see the whole "having the capability to bear children" as something womanly, and I am nullgender (I am aware other non-cisgendered people take different views).
EDIT: I'd like to also say, usually it's women giving me the hardest time about this subject which I find fascinating.
