do u think people think im lame for not having a gf?

[Tonus]

do u think when people see me they think "god what a loser, he probably doesnt even have a girlfriend" thats what i feel like people think when they see me in public.

As I understand it, we perceive ourselves to be much more noticed than we really are. It's a natural thing and everyone does it, but I think it's helpful to recognize that. Most of the time, people around us aren't anywhere near as aware of us as we think they are, nor do they pay as much attention to us as we think they do. It's not that people around you are picking you out of the crowd and thinking "wow, that guy is a loser." It's that you are picking yourself out of the crowd and thinking "I bet this crowd knows that I am a loser!"

Being confident has less to do with how awesome you actually are, and much more to do with how awesome you pretend to be. People will subconsciously pick up on clues and cues that we provide via our behavior. The confident person will bullshit others to the extreme, but even when people know that he's not being honest, they are attracted to his high self-esteem and will agree with his self-assessment even though they may not think they do!

Keep reminding yourself that "failing" isn't the end of the world. Most people who are very self-confident fuck up every now and then, but they just shrug it off (and may even rationalize it to keep the self-image where they want it to be). The rest of us tend to make way too much of a situation, as if embarrassing yourself will haunt you for the rest of your life. But most people either forget those moments or recall them fondly later on, so long as you maintain your self-esteem. You are much more responsible for how people perceive you than you think you are. Figure out how to use that.