Unconventional opinions

[Ben Davis]

I sort of agree here, except it only seems to make sense if marriage was mandatory, rather than optional. Plenty of couples I know are unmarried having been together for years, and they are certainly regarded as just as committed etc as any married couple.

In the UK, that's not the case, legally speaking. Married people are subject to different laws than unmarried people including tax benefits (a cash bribe!).

Some couples just like to do something further for whatever reason. You even said 'everyone should be free to express their commitment to their partner in whatever fashion they so choose'

Indeed. My partner and I are saving for a 'Commitment Ceremony' where we'll make public statements of our love, share the experience with our families and loved ones, create happy memories of a special occasion... all that good stuff! No religion will be involved and we won't be signing any Marriage Register. That will keep the government's nose out of my personal business but it will mean that I don't get the same rights as a married couple: I've had to make separate legal arrangements to cover those. For example, a man who's married with a family but doesn't give a shit about his wife and kids has more rights in their regard than I do! Marital status is not necessarily an indicator of commitment and regularly hides the flaws in a relationship behind a veneer of respectability (something we're good at, traditionally, in the UK).

well some people may choose to have a ceremony and have their state recognise their relationship in some official capacity.

Ask yourself 'why?'. I would suggest that this is due to cultural and/or religious indoctrination. If the government didn't use marriage as a social control mechanism or offer legal & financial bribes & incentives, you'd have more of a point. But granting your point for a moment, why should those who don't want that be afforded fewer rights than those who do?

I certainly agree that married couples should not have any greater rights than unmarried, but that's about as far as I can go.

Then to recycle some phraseology, 'freedom of marriage means freedom from marriage': let's build up a wall between relationship-commitment and state.