Spare the rod, spoil the child

[Tonus]

Parent probably wouldn't spank their children as much if it started hurting their hands after a certain point.

They'd just grab a belt or coat hanger or whatever else was handy. My mom was one of those types, who would even brag about it to other parents, as if beating a child bloody was some kind of badge of good parenting. What I don't think she ever understood was that severe physical punishment combined with never providing rewards for good behavior simply taught us that the best possible outcome was to not get caught.

You cannot beat goodness into a child or wickedness out of a child. You can beat resentment, bitterness, seething hatred, or similar feelings into them. With luck you might wind up with a child who becomes a better parent than you because they make sure to do everything differently, which is to say that they are better parents because they consider you a bad example. If that's you, then be grateful that your children are helping to make the world less of a clusterfuck than you attempted to leave it.