(July 16, 2014 at 7:12 pm)Luckie Wrote: Life can get even more miserable for a kid than they think it already is. In all reality the law requires you to feed and clothe them and send them to school. So.. whats that? Oh your DS. Its gone. TV/internet too. Cell phone? Not anymoreYou've been signed up for softball or public service after school. Huh what? Oh thats right you didnt clean your room so I had to. You had too much stuff, it turns out.
Thing is, such measures don't work all the time - they weren't very effective on my son. Just built resentment and didn't really get to the root of the problem. Took him to a child psychologist, and she recommended not taking his stuff away, but rather creating immediate consequences for bad behavior.
The way it was explained was that (for example), taking away his Xbox and computer away for a period of time builds resentment when the reason for the punishment has been long forgotten.
Instead, he gets a time out, or is sent out to do some yard work, or some other unpleasant task that will give him an opportunity to think over his actions - and afterwards, we sit down and talk. Not a lecture, but a face-to-face to try and get to the root of what he's thinking, and what we can do to solve the problem (obviously, there has to be a certain level of maturity). He's given as much opportunity to talk and to listen.
