Is promoting virginity harmful to young girls/women?

[Jenny A]

Why is it that you think "entertainment" sex and "intimate" sex are mutually exclusive...

I was responding to GalacticBusDriver's response where he(?) drew the distinction: "Intimacy comes from emotional attachment. Sex is entertainment. Conflating sex and intimacy is just the church's teachings coming out."

I would see a Christian view of sex as one that would always hold on to intimacy, and often with entertainment as well. But to describe sex as 'entertainment' and 'sport', and separate it out from intimacy, certainly would appear to me to lack something vital for any marriage.

This is just personal response, but I have two very different kinds of sex with the same man. Prior to marriage I also had both kinds of sex with every partner I've ever had. One is not exactly sport (that implies a competition) but it is a game. And that kind of sex is often off the charts in terms of sexual response. The other is highly intimate and emotionally communicative and very satisfying psychologically but not so much orgasmically. I wouldn't want to give up either one. I don't see why this should be an either/or conversation.

I don't think marriage has much to do with which kind of sex you have either.

I agree with Losty that teaching that loss of virginity equals bad girl, is a bad thing. It limits both kinds of good sex.

Teaching safe sex is a good thing.

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But to describe sex as 'entertainment' and 'sport', and separate it out from intimacy, certainly would appear to me to lack something vital for any marriage.

Whoa there champ. While I did make the distinction between sex and intimacy, I never said you can't enjoy both at the same time. I'll spell it out. Sex is not intimacy and intimacy is not sex. If it were, you could not have an intimate evening with a loved one without at least getting a blow job. Intimacy is mental and can be found in many places. Sex is physical and while it can be coupled with intimacy, it certainly doesn't have to be. Just as intimacy can be coupled with sex.

The best sex you'll ever have is with a no expectations, no regrets partner. Especially if she/he is a little (or maybe even a lot) on the wild side in the sack.

I recommend everyone have a fuck buddy, at least until they're married and I encourage open relationships within marriage. It takes mature attitudes to handle open relationships, but you shouldn't be getting married without a mature attitude to begin with.

Never had a fuck buddy. But in the event of sudden singleness, I can imagine wanting such a man. Probably still go looking for a partner though.