Okay, If Odd Rules Usually Reflect Prior Behavior

[Heywood]

As a parent, my job sometimes seems to consist entirely of signing things. Sometimes I actually read them, and then I am sorry.

I just signed the code of conduct for The National Science Bowl, a quiz-style science competition sort of like Jeopardy in which the kids compete is teams. The code of conduct includes the following (I'm paraphrasing here):

1. Competitors must keep their shoes and shirts on at all times.

2. Competitors must not drink, smoke or ingest illegal substances during the competition.

3. Competitors shall not vandalize the property on which the competition is held.

Now I'm trying to imagine previous matches in which the students were topless, shoeless, smoking pot, drinking Southern Comfort, and writing on the walls while answering timed questions about biology, geology, chemistry and physics. It's not a pretty picture.

I'm feel fairly safe in guaranteeing that my daughter won't take her shirt off in the middle of a round though. Who thinks this stuff up?

I don't think kids drink Southern Comfort anymore. That was kinda a 1982 thing. Your kids are probably drinking Fireball.