Nonsensical Fun: Distort a religion!

[abaris]

Saying unto them, Go into the village over against you, and straightway ye shall find an ass tied, and a colt with her: loose them, and bring them unto me.

This calls the whole premise of the New Testament in question. Now what can we learn from this?

First, Jesus liked it anal. We can savely assume that from reading the passage as every bible scholar will agree. But the more important point seems to be, that there's a colt involved too. Some may think, that Jesus wanted to use that colt to force the ass into doing his bidding. The more reasonable thought would be, and I daresay rural America got the message right away, Jesus was a freedom fighter, willing to defend his message at the point of a gun.

So, we can conclude, he didn't die for our sins at all. He died for our freedom to have anal intercourse and of course the right to bear arms. The oppressive government took the colt away from Jesus and submitted him to the most brutal torture. But he rose again, bearing the promise of not only bringing the colt again at his second coming, but an AK47 and a rocket launcher and angelic asses will blow a chorus of joy.