RE: Wrote a short story, let me know what you think.
April 25, 2015 at 5:59 am
(This post was last modified: April 25, 2015 at 5:59 am by BrianSoddingBoru4.)
It didn't feel much like a short story, more like an excerpt from a much longer piece. On the whole, I didn't care for it. Some of the transitions were sort of awkward, and the conflict between the grandmother and grandson was kind of murky. A couple of the passages were needlessly repetitive (in one short paragraph, the word 'twin' is used four times).
I think it could be vastly improved by a thousand or so words expanding the nature of the conflict and making the resolution of it more detailed.
Boru
I think it could be vastly improved by a thousand or so words expanding the nature of the conflict and making the resolution of it more detailed.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
