Why can't bread bakers and toaster manufacturers just talk to each other and decide once and for all what size their products need to be so as to fit the one into the other? This is the twenty-first century, dammit!
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'