Feeling pretty gutted

[MTL]

Thanks for the link, Rocket.

I do think my sister has some sort of issue;
but she doesn't fit that particular description to a T.

and most of her negative behaviour, as far as I'm aware,
is only toward me.

I HAVE noticed that some of her friends....and all of her boyfriends...seem to be people who tend to use HER;

and I have noticed that she, my mother, my grandmother, and my aunt (my mother's mother and older sister)
are all very much alike, insofar as they only seem to understand relationships in a "hierarchy" format,
where there is a social ladder or "pecking order".

The concept of "mutual respect" seems to evade them.

It does look like she may be suffering from some Cluster B personality disorder, from what you've described. Histrionic/narcissistic, probably. But I agree with you best to not worry about labels and just focus on her specific set of behaviours at hand that bother you.

Yeah, it leans toward the narcissistic.  I'm not an expert.  but you've got the kernel of the matter.

It's absolutely redundant to seek the respect of people whom you, yourself, cannot respect!!!