Meditation, such as mindfulness (not necessarily though) and therapy are preferable to rage. (duh)
If someone goes off on fits of rage, I see that as a defect - as someone who is a victim of their own emotions - and to hell with it being "natural".
I think there simply isn't room for people in today's society, especially emotionally unstable bunch, because of how we have structured civilization. I'm thinking anything from raising your voice over minutiae to full out brawl.
The good news is that people don't have to be at mercy of their emotions, and that people can learn to control their emotions, or at least preemptively anticipate them if they have a short fuse and react accordingly. That and therapy.
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Now, this is all well and good for yourself. But how do you defuse a situation, where someone goes off in a tangent and is raising their voice and being all pissy. In my experience, where a dangerous man approached me because I had the audacity to smile in a random direction, which caught his eye, and came up to me ready to fight me. I stood my ground, lost the smile and didn't give into his rage. I just stood there and he pulled a threatening pose and was all in my face and staring me down, I mean, really in my face. I didn't flinch and didn't give him any reason to punch me or anything. I don't remember exactly what he said, but it was something about me "laughing at him", I don't know where he got that idea, but I was talking to a friend of mine nearby at the same time. I've learned from others that he was a dangerous man, that he had fought a lot of people for no reason. Grade A asshole.
Defusing a situation is an art. Not that I am in any way an expert, but I've talked my way out of few heated situations from people with an edge on.
Another time a junkie tried to get a rise out of me by challenging me. I knew him from before he went all ass up, a hardass if you ever have met one. He kept raising his voice and tried to put me down. I simply shrugged it off as banter, yet he kept pressing me. He probably was looking for a reaction, and when I didn't give him one I simply said I wasn't interested in a stern voice while looking him straight in his eyes. Nothing came of it. He ODed some years later. He came from a troubled family. Rumors of his father beating his kids and absentee mother.
If someone goes off on fits of rage, I see that as a defect - as someone who is a victim of their own emotions - and to hell with it being "natural".
I think there simply isn't room for people in today's society, especially emotionally unstable bunch, because of how we have structured civilization. I'm thinking anything from raising your voice over minutiae to full out brawl.
The good news is that people don't have to be at mercy of their emotions, and that people can learn to control their emotions, or at least preemptively anticipate them if they have a short fuse and react accordingly. That and therapy.
---
Now, this is all well and good for yourself. But how do you defuse a situation, where someone goes off in a tangent and is raising their voice and being all pissy. In my experience, where a dangerous man approached me because I had the audacity to smile in a random direction, which caught his eye, and came up to me ready to fight me. I stood my ground, lost the smile and didn't give into his rage. I just stood there and he pulled a threatening pose and was all in my face and staring me down, I mean, really in my face. I didn't flinch and didn't give him any reason to punch me or anything. I don't remember exactly what he said, but it was something about me "laughing at him", I don't know where he got that idea, but I was talking to a friend of mine nearby at the same time. I've learned from others that he was a dangerous man, that he had fought a lot of people for no reason. Grade A asshole.
Defusing a situation is an art. Not that I am in any way an expert, but I've talked my way out of few heated situations from people with an edge on.
Another time a junkie tried to get a rise out of me by challenging me. I knew him from before he went all ass up, a hardass if you ever have met one. He kept raising his voice and tried to put me down. I simply shrugged it off as banter, yet he kept pressing me. He probably was looking for a reaction, and when I didn't give him one I simply said I wasn't interested in a stern voice while looking him straight in his eyes. Nothing came of it. He ODed some years later. He came from a troubled family. Rumors of his father beating his kids and absentee mother.
"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself — and you are the easiest person to fool." - Richard P. Feynman
