RE: In support of the rage of man
April 3, 2019 at 1:52 pm
(This post was last modified: April 3, 2019 at 1:54 pm by LadyForCamus.)
(April 2, 2019 at 8:50 pm)bennyboy Wrote: From where I stand, I can't imagine that this set of people is larger than zero. It's one thing to be deliberately aggressive-- unwanted hand on the shoulder, too-tight handshake, even getting violent just because you think you'll get what you want, and you expect to get away with it-- a lot of dick moves like that. But to lose control of one's emotions and even behavior on purpose? Is that even possible? Because it seems like a paradox to me-- "I choose to lose control."
I meant, in a broader sense, not choosing to seek help for a pattern of losing control so as to minimize harm to one’s self and others.
Quote:I think part of the problem is that people justify their lack of control, and that is taken at face value. Does a man who says, "She had it coming" really go into the scenario wanting to tee off? Or is he trying to examine that moment and justify it after the fact, to absolve himself of moral culpability? (I never said that, but that's the kind of thing we'd expect a particularly abusive man to say, right?)
I think "she had it coming" if better expressed would be more like "I felt threatened, trapped, and isolated, and something in me took over. I felt like I was losing control of the situation, and I panicked."
I agree.
(April 2, 2019 at 8:23 pm)LadyForCamus Wrote: Another question to ask is why many people with impulse control issues don’t seek help before they harm someone.
Quote:Much of manhood in our culture is defined by independence. You're the bread winner, you have to carry your burden in silence like a man. Complaining or asking for help is burdensome to others. There's that downside to a patriarchy-- if you are a man, you are expected to be unconditionally strong.
Well, maybe we need to redefine what “strong” means to men. Strong is to gather the courage to do something incredibly difficult and uncomfortable for the well-being of a family that the man has vowed to protect.
Nay_Sayer: “Nothing is impossible if you dream big enough, or in this case, nothing is impossible if you use a barrel of KY Jelly and a miniature horse.”
Wiser words were never spoken.
Wiser words were never spoken.