Left on my Car

[festive1]

So I went to lunch with a friend this afternoon, I get back to my car to find this tucked under my wiper blade:
I fucking hate this kind of shit. Just annoyed... I don't leave atheist propaganda on people's cars, why can't Christians do the same?

[CapnAwesome]

Basically Atheists don't have any drive to proselytize. Many churches (and Mosques) command their followers to go out and get new members. They spend millions and millions on such efforts. What difference does it make to me if somebody else is an atheist? Yet church membership declines every year, and people professing no religion has doubled in ten years. So I don't really get pissed at such stuff, I just smile, think about the facts and use that shit as fire starter.

[Darkstar]

I fucking hate this kind of shit. Just annoyed... I don't leave atheist propaganda on people's cars, why can't Christians do the same?

We don't need propaganda; we have actual facts. We don't need to push atheism, we need to push educationa and critical thinking, and atheism will come as a side effect.

If christianity were so self-evident, they wouldn't need to do this. Sometimes, christian desperacy really shows through.

[thesummerqueen]

That's nothing - my sister was at a soccer game and she and my mother came back to find a whole book left on the hood that described in great detail how rock music was the devil.

May I worship at the satanic altar of AC/DC forever and ever.

[festive1]

It makes me wanna drive over to the Mormon Temple with some fliers... Perhaps go out and leaflet the NRA headquarters in Fairfax... hmmm... That could be fun, though I'm sure they have security that would make it a lot less entertaining...

[thesummerqueen]

There are secular humanist fliers you can order. A guy in my local atheist group likes to preach-troll that way.

[festive1]

Nah... Not worth the killing of trees for my own amusement. Plus, the amusing part would be the reactions, and I wouldn't be motivated to sit around the parking lot waiting for people to come back to their cars.

[Minimalist]

They really do seem to think that we are just dying to hear their particular brand of bullshit.

The arrogance of xtians is truly amazing given that they gleefully accept the stupidest story ever concocted.

[Creed of Heresy]

I found a similar note under the wipers of my room-mate's car when I was out at Best Buy. More relevant to me was how it was saying atheists are the devil's soldiers and how all "true believers" must unite under a common flag to be ready to fight for the sanctity of our souls. And how convenient; the local Lutheran Baptist Church near where I used to live earlier in the year had all the supplies ready to equip these most holiest of warriors. *snrk* Namely, a bible and instructions on "how to witness." So naturally I did what any other inflammatory, aggressive heretic would do.

I took the slip of paper, went to the church at 2am, and nailed the note to their door with, literally, a nail and a hammer, and then scrawled in elegant, artistically-practiced cursive...

"Fuck you. Fuck your god. Fuck your christ. Fuck your pulpit. Fuck your priest. Do not touch my fucking car again or I will kneecap you all with a shotgun."

Will this incite anger towards atheists from this church? Maybe. Do I care? No. Everyone else may just let this shit slide. Unfortunately, I am tired of letting it slide. I am tired of it. I want to live my life without ever having to hear of this shit. But they won't leave me be. Fine. Then I'll be an aggressive, insulting, inciteful prick to them. I'm getting really tired of hearing nothing but bible-babble at every fucking turn.

Their mentality: "There are atheists in the world? THEY MUST NOT HAVE HEARD THE GOOD WORD ABOUT JEEBUS!!"
Our mentality: "No, fuckwit, we've heard TOO MUCH about Jeebus to the point we're all pretty fucking convinced he's a fucking myth; FUCK THE FUCK OFF."

But no. No. They can't fucking leave us be. They just want to fucking rant and ramble and burble their bullshit to us endlessly. They can't shut the fuck up and leave well enough alone. No, they see rising numbers of atheists and since the church no longer has the power to maintain an army of papal warriors and a force of dedicated inquisitors ready to stamp out any fucking heresy they see fit, they have to just scream as loud as they can. Well you know what? In any other situation, someone starts screaming at me eventually I'm going to scream back. That's how it is now. They can't shut the fuck up, they want to proselytize, babble their shit as they see fit, attaching their crap to the property of me and my fellow atheist room-mate? Well, let's see how they fucking like it. For the next three months I have pledged to nail an "I evolved, and so did you! Why Evolution is truth, and why the bible is bunk!" pamphlet to EVERY. SINGLE. FUCKING. CHURCH's main in the nearest 10 miles of my residence once every tree days for the next three months. I did my first round today, in fact. It is full of scientifically-backed info on why creationism is a load of shit and why evolution is inescapable truth, cartoony illustrations of monkeys becoming men, and Jesus wearing a robe that has the weeping-eye symbol of Horus symmetrically inked into it.

Let's see how much these fucking annoying assholes like it. Let's just fucking see. And you know what? Better yet! I'm gonna put these pamphlets under the windshields of every car parked in a church's parking lot!

Atheists have no need for proselytizing, it's true. But you know what, if I can get one poor uninformed brainwashed deluded soul to see the light of reason IT'LL ALL BE FUCKING WORTH IT! You know why? BECAUSE IT'LL BE ME SPITTING IN THE FACE OF ALL THESE PAPIST/PULPIT-BANGING IDIOTS. If my efforts can get one person to see the truth and to stop believing in lies, to accept the strength of will it requires to become an atheist, or at least question the world about them, it'll all be worth it. And every person after that is a bonus.

Difference between me and a preacher; I wield truth, logic, and reason. They wield lies, falsehoods, bigotry, ignorance, hate, and deceit. My weapon is just. Theirs...a hollow fucking lie meant to give power to those who have done nothing to deserve it.

[thesummerqueen]

Creed, here's a cool washcloth, some iced tea, and a piece of pie. Simmer down.