"I'll pray for you."

[HiImJohn]

I've heard "I'll pray for you" more times than I can recall, but I wonder how many people actually kneel down at the side of their bed and pray for me to find God when they get home that night.

Just out of curiosity, how many of you have been told that you would be prayed for?

[festive1]

I've also been told, "I'll pray for you." Hasn't helped much, I'm still an atheist.

[Minimalist]

It's always conditional.

[Jackalope]

I got that a lot when I was in intensive care in January. Plenty of people offered to pray - I wish some of them would have visited instead. The people who did take the time to visit? With one exception, all atheists.

[Something completely different]

Someone told me he would pray to Allah to send me to hell.

Henceforth I avoided that individual as if he had cholera.

[Minimalist]

Someone told me he would pray to Allah to send me to hell.

Henceforth I avoided that individual as if he had cholera.

Apparently allah is too stupid to reach that conclusion on his own? Some god they have there.

[YahwehIsTheWay]

I've heard "I'll pray for you" more times than I can recall

That's our code for "fuck off and die, heretic". The only thing we pray for is a return to the good old days when we could torture The Holy Spirit into you before we burn you at the stake.

---

Someone told me he would pray to Allah to send me to hell.

Muslims have no sense of subtly the way we do.

[Cyberman]

I've been told this lots of times in the past, though thankfully it's not something I hear since my sweet Princess was stolen from me three years ago nor something to which I would take kindly in that context.

My only question, which I've mentioned before, is why do people who say it feel the need to do so? In other words, if praying for me would have any effect at all, why tell me about it? Wouldn't whatever it's meant to do simply happen anyway? Why should telling me about it matter in the slightest? The only reason that makes any sense - inasmuch as the word 'sense' can apply - is that it makes the person doing the praying, or at least announcing their intentions to do so, feel important, perhaps even superior to everyone else.

Basically there are three types of prayer. First, there's the "I'm special because I can talk to God" variety just described. Then there's the type in which the person truly has the best of intentions - whether or not they believe that praying actually works, their hearts and their sympathies are at least in the right place. Finally, there's the default form of prayer announcement which translates to "Yeah? Well, fuck you!" or "I've identified something broken in your character, some fundamental flaw which does not match up to my standards, so I am going to hide behind religious language in order to tell you this to your face."

[Cato]

I hear this more than I care to. I usually reply with something quippy:

"Well, that's a complete waste of fucking time."
"Since you'll be on your knees, I would much prefer a blow job."

The list is endless depending on what prompted the useless gesture.

[DeistPaladin]

I hear this more than I care to. I usually reply with something quippy:
...

"Tell your imaginary friend I said 'hi'."