Hello there. I am HarrowedItalics [pronounced as 'I' talics]. I guess I'll start out with my story, huh?
I was 1 month old when my biological mother left me in Shoprite [a super-market]. Ever since then, my life's been one big roller coaster. My step mother, when I was six, hit my fragile head with a high heel shoe 27 times. I say fragile because not only was I six, but I was born with a lump the size of ... well, the size of the angel emoticon next to the typing area of the screen. Luckily, they performed surgery when I was five, but still, several months later I was in recovery due to a horrible immune system. Doctors still don't know what it was. Anyways, Doctors say that any more and I'd be permanently damaged - I'm glad she stopped at 27. However I distinctly remember that day - and doctors said two things. One, that if the DYFS workers hadn't come when they'd came, I'd be dead from blood loss and lack of hospital care [she'd left me standing in my room - yes, STANDING, for all day with a scarf around my eyes, it was magenta, and the belt she hit me with tied around my hands], and two that I would suffer from constant headaches that would later develop into migraines as I grew older.
From there on I went through 4 foster homes. My last one, I'd stayed in for roughly 2 and a half years. I was nine when I left the system and went back to my family. My step mother still lived with them at the time, and from there until I was eleven she found a way to torture me that didn't leave scars. Yes, she would emotionally put me down, but I'm not talking about that. She'd leave me in the cold water of the shower for hours - clothes on, and would force me to wear those clothes to bed. She and my father then divorced when I was 11 and for the past three years I've been living my life with only one fear - my father.
I tell you this not for condolences, not for pity but for you to understand why I do not believe. I don't believe a God would let his subject live like that - just as I don't believe this all-knowing, almighty God would let legions of people starve - people who SERVE him, who LIVE FOR HIM, starve.
Here's the more hilarious way to put it - I lack belief in a giant, dress-wearing, bearded man up in the sky telling us how to live our life when obviously he could fix his up himself.
Anyways, Hi. I'm 14 years old, come from a busted up family, and up until recently have claimed to be agnostic - several things changed that to atheism, yet I have no desire to express what changed. I like anime, manga and listening to music. I do some light reading from time to time, and I also like to write. However, art is my main forte.
I was 1 month old when my biological mother left me in Shoprite [a super-market]. Ever since then, my life's been one big roller coaster. My step mother, when I was six, hit my fragile head with a high heel shoe 27 times. I say fragile because not only was I six, but I was born with a lump the size of ... well, the size of the angel emoticon next to the typing area of the screen. Luckily, they performed surgery when I was five, but still, several months later I was in recovery due to a horrible immune system. Doctors still don't know what it was. Anyways, Doctors say that any more and I'd be permanently damaged - I'm glad she stopped at 27. However I distinctly remember that day - and doctors said two things. One, that if the DYFS workers hadn't come when they'd came, I'd be dead from blood loss and lack of hospital care [she'd left me standing in my room - yes, STANDING, for all day with a scarf around my eyes, it was magenta, and the belt she hit me with tied around my hands], and two that I would suffer from constant headaches that would later develop into migraines as I grew older.
From there on I went through 4 foster homes. My last one, I'd stayed in for roughly 2 and a half years. I was nine when I left the system and went back to my family. My step mother still lived with them at the time, and from there until I was eleven she found a way to torture me that didn't leave scars. Yes, she would emotionally put me down, but I'm not talking about that. She'd leave me in the cold water of the shower for hours - clothes on, and would force me to wear those clothes to bed. She and my father then divorced when I was 11 and for the past three years I've been living my life with only one fear - my father.
I tell you this not for condolences, not for pity but for you to understand why I do not believe. I don't believe a God would let his subject live like that - just as I don't believe this all-knowing, almighty God would let legions of people starve - people who SERVE him, who LIVE FOR HIM, starve.
Here's the more hilarious way to put it - I lack belief in a giant, dress-wearing, bearded man up in the sky telling us how to live our life when obviously he could fix his up himself.
Anyways, Hi. I'm 14 years old, come from a busted up family, and up until recently have claimed to be agnostic - several things changed that to atheism, yet I have no desire to express what changed. I like anime, manga and listening to music. I do some light reading from time to time, and I also like to write. However, art is my main forte.
Welcome and have fun!
