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Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 2:38 pm
I just found out that I have to go to church tonight for Christmas Eve. My family knows I'm a atheist but that doesn't seem to matter as the pastor is my grandfather. I however find church intolerable. Any body got any advice or in the same boat?
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 2:41 pm
Fall asleep during the service. That'll show em.
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 2:44 pm
(December 24, 2013 at 2:38 pm)Lemonvariable72 Wrote: I just found out that I have to go to church tonight for Christmas Eve. My family knows I'm a atheist but that doesn't seem to matter as the pastor is my grandfather. I however find church intolerable. Any body got any advice or in the same boat?
Why do you have to go?
Anyway, I'm going to be spending Christmas day with my boyfriends family and they're fundies. I don't think they're going to really be pushing anything on me or him, though; there might be a prayer before we eat or something like that and under that circumstance, well, when in rome, do as the romans do. Great thing about being an atheist is that I don't believe I have some angry diety, watching over my shoulder, ready to smite me for an insecere prayer to the wrong diety.
I live on facebook. Come see me there. http://www.facebook.com/tara.rizzatto
"If you cling to something as the absolute truth and you are caught in it, when the truth comes in person to knock on your door you will refuse to let it in." ~ Siddhartha Gautama
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 2:45 pm
Act posessed, and not by the holey spirit style, either.
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 2:49 pm
I just got back from "crib service". Greatly enjoyed it, good sing song, carols, kids dressed as sheep (insert joke here). Resisted the temptation to ask how the magi knew which house to find them in (the average star, not too specific) and enjoyed it for what it was worth.
"Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken."
Sith code
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 2:55 pm
Listen to music, play video games, or if you really want to go for the win, start masturbating.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 2:55 pm
(This post was last modified: December 24, 2013 at 2:57 pm by Ksa.)
(December 24, 2013 at 2:38 pm)Lemonvariable72 Wrote: I just found out that I have to go to church tonight for Christmas Eve. My family knows I'm a atheist but that doesn't seem to matter as the pastor is my grandfather. I however find church intolerable. Any body got any advice or in the same boat?
When that happens I usually take 90mg of codeine, it turns me into a zombie so I barely notice when time flies by and don't feel the excruciating pain of Church because it's an opioid painkiller on top of being a CNS downer.
While under the effect, events that might inflict emotional trauma under normal conditions like witnessing a decapitation, a plane crash, someone dying on a hospital bed or going to church with your family will have little to no effect.
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 2:56 pm
(This post was last modified: December 24, 2013 at 2:56 pm by JesusHChrist.)
(December 24, 2013 at 2:38 pm)Lemonvariable72 Wrote: I just found out that I have to go to church tonight for Christmas Eve. My family knows I'm a atheist but that doesn't seem to matter as the pastor is my grandfather. I however find church intolerable. Any body got any advice or in the same boat?
I suppose it depends on how old you are, how much potential familial disruption you're willing to take on and how strongly you feel about standing up for what you think is the right thing to do.
I also find church services intolerable -- gives me the heebee jeebees. So much nonsense packed into such a small time slot! On the upside, I remember there being lots of hot chicks. Lots.
I stopped going with my parents when I was around 15-16. They were "jack" Catholics - only attending church on Christmas and Easter. Other than the hot chicks, I don't feel like I'm missing out, nor does Jesus seem to mind much. He still never calls.
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 3:00 pm
(December 24, 2013 at 2:55 pm)Ksa Wrote: When that happens I usually take 90mg of codeine, it turns me into a zombie so I barely notice when time flies by and don't feel the excruciating pain of Church because it's an opioid painkiller on top of being a CNS downer.
While under the effect, events that might inflict emotional trauma under normal conditions like witnessing a decapitation, a plane crash, someone dying on a hospital bed or going to church with your family will have little to no effect.
If you're going to go that route, you can do so much better than codeine.
Why not take some mushrooms or LSD, and the whole thing will be funny as hell.
[Disclaimer: I may or may not actually be advocating the above.]
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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RE: Dealing with church.
December 24, 2013 at 3:02 pm
On a serious note, though, if it was me, I would make it such hell for everyone that they wouldn't dare want to take me next year.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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