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The I HAVE THE POWER Game

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The I HAVE THE POWER Game
Cinjin Offline Donators
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#1
The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 12:33 am
YOU ARE GOD!

That's right, for this game you're god, but not just any god. You're the dictator and narcissistic bastard, Jehovah. Therefore, you must answer prayers and solve problems the way Jehovah would. Once you answer the prayer of the person above you, you may then leave one prayer request. I'll start and leave an example:


Dear god, I would very much like to have new snow tires for my wife's car. I don't want her to be stranded on the highway in the cold Michigan weather.

Answer:
I just gave your wife a brain aneurism. She won't be getting stuck anywhere.


Be inventive with your answers. Yahweh's an asshole. Have fun. Here's my prayer request for the next Jehovah joining the thread:


Dear god, my tennis elbow is really acting up and I can hardly use my right arm. Any help would be great.
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Ryantology Offline
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#2
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 12:38 am
Answer: I'll remove your penis so that you never injure yourself playing "tennis" again.

Prayer: My dealer never showed up. Could you do something, Lord?
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Cinjin Offline Donators
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#3
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 12:44 am
(January 6, 2014 at 12:38 am)Ryantology Wrote: Prayer: My dealer never showed up. Could you do something, Lord?


Answer:
No. You're being tested. Patience will teach you much.



Dear god, I would like it very much if you would keep your messengers off of AF.org. Please?
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Jackalope Offline
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#4
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 12:44 am
(January 6, 2014 at 12:38 am)Ryantology Wrote: Answer: I'll remove your penis so that you never injure yourself playing "tennis" again.

Prayer: My dealer never showed up. Could you do something, Lord?

Answer: I afflicted a poor village with famine. You're welcome.

Prayer: World peace. I can haz?
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Sejanus Offline
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#5
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 12:54 am (This post was last modified: January 6, 2014 at 12:54 am by Sejanus.)
(January 6, 2014 at 12:44 am)Cthulhu Dreaming Wrote:
(January 6, 2014 at 12:38 am)Ryantology Wrote: Answer: I'll remove your penis so that you never injure yourself playing "tennis" again.

Prayer: My dealer never showed up. Could you do something, Lord?

Answer: I afflicted a poor village with famine. You're welcome.

Prayer: World peas. I can haz?

Answer: World peas you say? okay, all the Christians get 1 pea. Everyone else gets leukemia.

Prayer: Can you help me pass my exams? kthxbai
[Image: thfrog.gif]



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Jackalope Offline
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#6
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 12:58 am
Answer: You get to skip your college exams due to failing a proctological exam. Ain't cancer a bitch?

Prayer: Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes-Benz. My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends.
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Ryantology Offline
shitlord
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#7
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 1:03 am
(January 6, 2014 at 12:44 am)Cthulhu Dreaming Wrote:
(January 6, 2014 at 12:38 am)Ryantology Wrote: Answer: I'll remove your penis so that you never injure yourself playing "tennis" again.

Prayer: My dealer never showed up. Could you do something, Lord?

Answer: I afflicted a poor village with famine. You're welcome.

Prayer: World peace. I can haz?

Answer: I offer the kind of peace Tacitus described.

Prayer: Can it not be so cold out?
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Belac Enrobso Offline
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#8
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 1:37 am (This post was last modified: January 6, 2014 at 1:37 am by Belac Enrobso.)
Answer: unfortunately, due to the unstable shitty housing market, your housing lease has just went up 10 fold, but hey, there's cheap housing in the warm neighborHOODs of Miami Florida.

Prayer: my wife doesn't love me, could you guide us through our troubles and restore our true love.
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pineapplebunnybounce Offline
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#9
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 1:40 am
(January 6, 2014 at 1:37 am)Belac Enrobso Wrote: Answer: unfortunately, due to the unstable shitty housing market, your housing lease has just went up 10 fold, but hey, there's cheap housing in the warm neighborHOODs of Miami Florida.

Prayer: my wife doesn't love me, could you guide us through our troubles and restore our true love.

Answer: She's now pregnant with Jesus's brother. You're welcome.

Prayer: Finish this essay for me, please? I want to sleep Sad.
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Ryantology Offline
shitlord
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#10
RE: The I HAVE THE POWER Game
January 6, 2014 at 1:54 am
Answer: I just pasted the word "DICKS" until it filled ten pages. Hope you get an A!

Prayer: My wife is making me take the Christmas tree down tomorrow. Change her mind?
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The I HAVE THE POWER Game

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