Posts: 3432
Threads: 102
Joined: November 13, 2013
Reputation:
59
Your revelation
July 13, 2014 at 6:31 pm
One of the odd things about the bible (and the quran) is the level of minor detail. That God, in one of his few direct communications with mankind, tells them not to boil a goat in its own milk. Or precise instructions on what to do If two men have a fight and a woman steps in and grabs one of their ballsacks. I mean how often does that come up?!
So let's say 6000 odd years ago. You're god. You have a limited word count. What would YOU impart to mankind?
Germ theory?
How to make flushable loos?
Women are people too?
What would your message be?
"Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken."
Sith code
Posts: 4349
Threads: 385
Joined: August 25, 2008
Reputation:
57
RE: Your revelation
July 13, 2014 at 6:37 pm
"Embrace science and find out how I did it. Oh, and be nice to each other as well."
~God
Posts: 4659
Threads: 123
Joined: June 27, 2014
Reputation:
40
RE: Your revelation
July 13, 2014 at 6:38 pm
I'd replace mankind with a better species.
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you
Posts: 736
Threads: 38
Joined: December 3, 2013
Reputation:
10
RE: Your revelation
July 13, 2014 at 6:39 pm
If you're handling chillies, don't have a wank afterwards.
Posts: 4344
Threads: 43
Joined: February 21, 2012
Reputation:
64
RE: Your revelation
July 13, 2014 at 6:40 pm
I'd make it one of those 'magic eye's books and blow their fucking minds. I could be a lot more helpful but watching humanity freak the fuck out would be hilarious, you can't pass up that opportunity.
Posts: 2471
Threads: 21
Joined: December 7, 2013
Reputation:
43
RE: Your revelation
July 13, 2014 at 6:46 pm
Esteem others more highly than yourself, and [I] will lift you up (you'll benefit from selflessness, nurturing, and empathy in the long run... Hold fast).
Posts: 35289
Threads: 204
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation:
146
RE: Your revelation
July 13, 2014 at 6:47 pm
"Be excellent to each other!"
Heard that somewhere before . . .
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation:
156
RE: Your revelation
July 13, 2014 at 6:53 pm
"Work it out for yourselves. Don't look to me for answers. I gave you free will - use it."
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'