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Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
#1
Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
[Image: 140417140915-andre-johnson-facebook-story-top.jpg](CNN)
Andre Johnson was severely injured in April after he severed his penis and leaped from the second level of a building in North Hollywood. He told E! that he was under the influence of drugs at the time but insisted that he knew what he was doing.
"Yes, I was using drugs that night, but I was in complete control," he said. "I cut it off because that was the root of all my problems. My solution to the problem was the realization that sex is for mortals, and I am a god. ...Those kinds of activities got me into trouble, and I came here to be a god."
Johnson performs under the name Christ Bearer and his group Northstar was affiliated with the Wu-Tang Clan. Johnson said he hadn't spoken out on the incident before because "People perceived me as crazy, so I never wanted to speak wholeheartedly on the matter."
Doctors weren't able to reattach the penis, he told E!.
He said he had been seeing a psychologist after he was discharged but that he has been deemed okay. He said he was thankful to God when he awoke in the hospital still alive.
"I didn't want to kill myself," Johnson said. "That was just my response to the demons. They were doing their best to get to me, but being alive solidified my thoughts. ...I'm alive, penis or no penis."


Normally I would say. Great! Because there are some people that shouldn't be allowed to reproduce. However in this case it's useless because he already has two daughters….. they're must be really proud of him right now.
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#2
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
Well, the xtian theologian Origen castrated himself... an act which should be emulated by theologians everywhere.
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#3
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
(August 9, 2014 at 9:51 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Well, the xtian theologian Origen castrated himself... an act which should be emulated by theologians everywhere.
They do say that:
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery
[Image: info-onion-head-emoticon.gif]
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#4
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
Cutting off your dick isn't going to get rid of the urges to have sex, genius.
Poe's Law: "Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won't mistake for the real thing."

10 Christ-like figures that predate Jesus. Link shortened to Chris ate Jesus for some reason...
http://listverse.com/2009/04/13/10-chris...ate-jesus/

Good video to watch, if you want to know how common the Jesus story really is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88GTUXvp-50

A list of biblical contradictions from the infallible word of Yahweh.
http://infidels.org/library/modern/jim_m...tions.html

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#5
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
(August 9, 2014 at 10:30 pm)Chad32 Wrote: Cutting off your dick isn't going to get rid of the urges to have sex, genius.


But it does make the consequence of that urge less severe for subsequent generations.
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#6
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
He is now a goddess.
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#7
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
(August 9, 2014 at 10:48 pm)psychoslice Wrote: He is now a goddess.
A goddess with beard?
[Image: vomiting-onion-head-emoticon.gif]
That's just wrong.
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#8
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
(August 9, 2014 at 10:52 pm)Zidneya Wrote:
(August 9, 2014 at 10:48 pm)psychoslice Wrote: He is now a goddess.
A goddess with beard?
[Image: vomiting-onion-head-emoticon.gif]
That's just wrong.

That's actually her pubes.
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#9
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
Wasn't this several months ago?
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#10
RE: Andre Johnson Severs His Own Penis after declaring he is a God
What's a couple months give or take a severed penis or two?
If there is a god, I want to believe that there is a god.  If there is not a god, I want to believe that there is no god.
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